


I Will Wait For You

by YoukaiAngel



Series: I Will Wait For You [1]
Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Canon Compliant, Child Rin, F/M, Gen, Multi, non sexual, sessrin - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:34:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 35,895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25039342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YoukaiAngel/pseuds/YoukaiAngel
Summary: Growing up under Lady Kaede’s care, all Rin seems to want is for Lord Sesshomaru to come back for her. However, there are many things a little human girl must learn first.
Relationships: Higurashi Kagome/InuYasha, Miroku/Sango (InuYasha), Rin/Sesshoumaru (InuYasha)
Series: I Will Wait For You [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1818376
Comments: 81
Kudos: 90





	1. I Will Wait For You

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first InuYasha fic I have written in a long time, and the first one I have posted. I’m hoping to continue this work and turn it into something a bit more long running, but we’ll see.  
> I will be totally honest, there really isn’t any overarching plot to this fic, it is more like a series of drabbles and one shots exploring the relationships and interactions between various characters, mostly from Rin’s POV.  
> I would greatly appreciate any thoughts or comments anyone has! Thanks for reading :)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sesshomaru and Rin have to make the difficult decision; should Rin stay in the village or continue with Sesshomaru.

‘Lord Sesshomaru.’

The old lady’s voice called after him, stopping him in his tracks. His troupe stopped behind him, not without Jaken walking straight into the lord’s leg, while he waited to hear whatever pearls of wisdom the senior priestess had to offer.

‘A word, if I may?’

Evidently, her pearls were for him alone. The old lady turned and began walking away, up the steps to the shrine.

‘It’s okay, Lord Sesshomaru,’ Rin chirped. ‘We’ll wait for you here.’

He cast a glance down at the young girl beaming brightly up at him. His curiosity alone was not quite enough to make him want to follow the old lady simply to listen to her words, but Rin’s subtle encouragement prompted him to move. He turned and followed Kaede up the steps.

The priestess was stopped in front of the shrine. He stepped up alongside her, his gaze absorbing the scene; the aged wooden frame, the greenery surrounds, the darkness beyond the doors, and the omnipresent awe that the humans’ reverence left on the structure. A passing glance would’ve left the impression of _ordinary_ , but given the time to absorb the details, there was much more to be found in the shrine than the eye could behold.

‘Do ye intend on continuing down this path ye is treading?’

The old woman broke the silence between them. Before Sesshomaru could answer though, she added, ‘nay, I shan’t waste your time with futile questions.’ She lifted her bow and gently tapped it on the ground at her feet. ‘Has ye given any thought to the future of your young companion, Rin?’

To be plain, it wasn’t something he gave thought to often. Rin’s future was her own, regardless of what Sesshomaru did or desired, so thinking of her future would have little or no impact.

‘She is but a mortal,’ Kaede continued. ‘And while you continue to take your path towards becoming a great demon lord, as was your father, do you think you will always be able to protect her?’

‘Yes.’ He answered without giving it any thought. He knew he would do whatever was required to always protect Rin.

Kaede gave a small impressed smile. ‘So assured of your dedication,’ she commented. ‘It is very admirable.’ Kaede raised her bow an inch off they ground again and turned to face Sesshomaru before gently tapping it down again. ‘Let me ask ye this,’ she said. ‘Do ye think Rin will live her fullest life, if she continues on your path?’

For this, he could not give an answer.

‘Do not try to deceive me, I know ye cares deeply for the girl. Only one with a bond as strong as yours would follow into the depths of Naraku’s body to rescue her.’

Sesshomaru slowly blinked, his face carefully blank.

‘How many times, in the short time she has been travelling with ye, has ye had to rescue her from danger?’

He remained silent. He didn’t know the answer, as he hadn’t kept count, but it was many. More than he cared to acknowledge at least.

‘All it would take is one lucky demon. It need not be stronger, or smarter than ye, but with some unfortunate luck, you may not be able to protect her.’

Sesshomaru cast a glance downward to the woman beside him. ‘You’re suggesting she stay here, in this village, with you humans?’

‘She is human, is she not?’

It was an idea he had toyed with, on odd occasions, usually when Rin’s life had been severely threatened. It was an idea he had brought to the forefront more than once in recent times. Knowing now that he would not be able to save her with the Tenseiga if she were ever lost again, the idea hit a nerve that might’ve been mistaken for fear, if he had a solid comprehension of what fear felt like.

But it was not his place to dictate to her what she should or shouldn’t do with her life, and that wasn’t about to change.

‘Rin is free to make her own choices. If you wish for her to stay here, it is not I you should be persuading.’

‘Is she?’ Kaede returned. ‘The girl trusts you implicitly. You, and your judgement.’ She did not need to finish the rest of her thoughts for Sesshomaru to understand her meaning. ‘It need not be forever,’ she continued. ‘But while ye marches on towards your destiny, it may be wiser for Rin to be removed from harm’s way.’

Her words pulled a painful chord in his chest. It didn’t need to be forever, but it could very well be. What if Rin chose to live in a village? What if she chose to never be with him again? Forever without Rin would be a very long time.

But the alternative could be much, much worse. If something were to happen to Rin while she travelled with him, _forever_ would be permanent. That was a fate he simply could not allow.

Nevertheless, it was still Rin’s choice. Sesshomaru turned on his heel as he said, ’if you think you can persuade her, go ahead.’

Kaede sighed heavily as she followed after him back towards the stairs, and muttered, ‘as stubborn as your brother, you are.’

Sesshomaru returned to his waiting entourage while Kaede was still working her way down the many steps. ‘Ready to go now, Lord Sesshomaru?’ Rin enquired. Her bright smile warmed him through, but the old lady’s words still rattled him.

‘Not yet,’ he said. ‘The priestess would like a word with you first, Rin.’

‘Oh!’ Rin promptly about-faced, swinging her arms and snapping them to her sides as she turned, to see the old lady hobbling down the steps. ‘Then I shall go help her!’ she announced before dashing off to help Kaede make her way back down the stairs.

They reached the bottom of the steps together, and then stopped.

Sesshomaru watched their discussion from afar. His keen hearing allowed him to catch words, but he tried his best to allow her privacy. Despite his best intentions though, his curiosity got the better of him, and he found himself listening to their conversation.

‘I don’t suppose you would consider a simpler life?’ the old lady asked. ‘Without the travel, and fear of demons.’

‘I am not afraid of demons,’ Rin declared boldly. ‘And I don’t mind the travel at all. I like being with Lord Sesshomaru.’

Her assurance brought a warmth to him that only the sweet girl was capable of.

‘What do you suppose would happen,’ the old lady continued, ‘if a demon were to try to threaten him, by taking your life?’

There was that nerve the old woman seemed to enjoy striking. The mere idea that anyone would dare endanger or bring harm to Rin while she was with him made him want to reach for his sword. However, he remained still.

‘Well,’ Rin answered, ‘Lord Sesshomaru has the Tenseig—’ Rin stopped herself mid sentence with a little finger on her cheek. ‘Oh wait,’ she realised, ‘that won’t work on me.’ As always, she bore no hint of concern. It was now just a fact that she could no longer be revived by Tenseiga.

The old lady tilted her head as she asked, ‘do you think that he would lay down his own life, in order to protect yours?’

The answer did not come to him as instantly as he would’ve liked. When he considered it, he found that the reason he had no answer was mostly because he never thought that there would be an opponent capable of taking his life. He knew he was prepared to do whatever was required to ensure Rin’s safety though.

‘I…’ Rin was uncertain as well. ‘I don’t know,’ she murmured. ‘What are you saying?’

‘My dear child,’ the old woman explained. ‘I am saying that if you truly would like the best for your Lord Sesshomaru, perhaps it would be better to let him walk his path alone for a time.’

Rin blinked at the priestess, and waited for further explanation.

‘After seeing what he has done in order to save you from the belly of Naraku, I have no doubts that he would go to the depths of hell in order to rescue you, or indeed give up his own life if it meant prolonging yours. He may struggle to admit it, but it is plain to one as old and wise as I.’

Rin’s head tilted. Perhaps she didn’t understand the priestess’ meaning. No, on closer inspection Sesshomaru found the familiar expression; this was new information to her.

‘And if I may be frank, my child,’ the woman continued, ‘if he were to suffer your loss, the pain he would feel may be too much for even he to bear.’

Rin’s gaze dropped to her toes, normal for when she was lost deep in thought or consideration. Even from the distance, Sesshomaru could see the tension between her brows, strained with the heavy notions.

‘May I ask of you,’ the old lady asked, ‘would you stay here with me, to grant Lord Sesshomaru, and perhaps an old lady, some peace of mind?’

Rin’s brow furrowed further. ‘But,’ she declared, ‘I want to stay with Lord Sesshomaru.’ She was full of defiance, just as she always had been at the idea of departing his side, just as he knew she would be.

‘Aye,’ the woman agreed. ‘And I know he would much enjoy if you were to stay with him. But,’ she made that motion, lifting her bow an inch from the ground and tapping it again. ‘I ask ye to think rationally, and make a choice that is of mutual benefit to both.’

Rin was quiet for a moment, her eyes wide. She didn’t seem to be able to find the words, stammering out, ‘But,’ with nothing more. Her voice was frail, tender and cracked. Sesshomaru loathed to hear that tone from her, the one that made him feel as though he had failed her. He was walking towards her before he could stop himself. Her words returned as the drops of emotion spilled over her cheeks, ‘I want to stay with Lord Sesshomaru!’ Her fists balled at her sides and she stamped her foot, her body a small mass of hot sadness. Perhaps he should not have let the woman speak to Rin. It was his fault that she felt this way. His steps quickened, eager to remove her from the situation causing her pain.

She turned when she heard his steps, looking towards him. It was not the usual gleeful smile that she greeted him with though. Instead she pursed her lips as she ran towards him, no hesitation as she threw her small arms around his legs.

‘Please don’t leave me behind, Lord Sesshomaru!’ she pleaded, her timid voice muffled by his nobukama. ‘I promise I won’t die! Please!’

His raised his eyes to scowl at the old lady. ‘You’ve said too much,’ he scorned.

But she held her head high and tapped her bow on the ground again. ‘I have merely opened her eyes to the truth of your devotion to her.’

He turned his gaze down to Rin. Her arms were tight around his legs, but she drew her head back enough to look up at him. ‘Please,’ she murmured, her voice strained with the tears in her throat. ‘I promise I won’t die.’

It was a promise she had broken twice before even making it. And as much as it pained him, the old lady had a point. He peeled Rin’s arms from around his thighs and knelt down on one knee before her, holding her small hands in his. ‘Rin,’ he asked in a steady tone, ‘do you wish to continue travelling with me?’

Rin nodded quickly. ‘Uh-huh,’ she murmured, rubbing her eyes against her shoulder to wipe away the tears. Lord Sesshomaru did not like to see her cry, and she needed to be brave. ‘I always want to be with you.’

‘Even though it puts your life in danger?’ he asked.

‘I don’t care!’

Rin’s own outburst made her draw in on her self, her head bowing down. Her shoulder’s trembled, fighting back her emotions.

‘Rin.’

His voice was calm and soothing. She took a deep breath and looked up to his eyes again. ‘I want to be with you, Lord Sesshomaru,’ she insisted. ’Forever.’

‘And you will be.’

Rin’s body shook, a tremble running through her. She pulled her hands from Sesshomaru’s and threw them around his neck, pouncing in to his lap. It was not often that Rin accosted him with physical affection, but in her moments of fear and sadness, he never refused to oblige her. He gently placed his hands on her back, holding her small frame against him.

They had been travelling together for some time now. She had certainly grown since she first came across him in the forest, but she was still so small. As a human, he knew she had years ahead of her, but the old priestess was correct. Her life may not be lived to the fullest if she stayed with him. He said softly to her, ‘you know that if something were to take your life again, I could not save you.’

Her arms trembled. ‘I…’ she mumbled, ‘yes.’ She tightened her grip, unwilling to let go.

‘However,’ he added, ‘the decision is still yours to make.’

She remained quiet. He knew what his preference for his own selfish needs were. She made his days bearable, tolerable even. Despite her constant antics with Jaken and human needs for food and sleep, her company was pleasant. But it was true that her life could be significantly shortened if she continued to travel with him. While he took every care to ensure that she would be safe, more than once his care was not enough to keep her out of harm’s way. And after all, if a simple life safe from the threat of demons was enough for the women in his father’s life, it was probably not a bad idea for Rin.

‘Lord Sesshomaru,’ she whispered to his shoulder. ‘If I were to die, would you be sad?’

The question made him hesitate. It was similar to a question she had asked once before, but he didn’t have the fortitude to give her an answer then. He knew now that he needed to be honest with her. He answered softly, ‘yes.’

Rin squeezed her arms around him. She murmured, her voice heavy with tears again, ‘I do not want you to be sad.’

The chord in his chest pulled tighter. As painful as her decision was though, it was the right one. His hands tightened around her, encircling her in his arms and holding her close to his chest. Her little body trembled as she clung to him and he could hear her gentle sobs.

‘What are you doing silly girl?’

Jaken’s brash cry yelled out as he approached them, evidently tired of waiting. ‘Huh?’ he cried as he saw Rin buried in Sesshomaru’s arms. ‘Stop this nonsense, you’re holding up Lord Sesshomaru!’

‘Jaken.’

Jaken recoiled at the dark tone from his master.

‘Be quiet.’

‘Oh.’ Jaken shrunk backwards two steps. ‘Yes, my lord.’

Sesshomaru returned his attention to the little girl in his arms. Her sobs had stifled but she still didn’t release her grip around him. She nuzzled her head into the crook of his neck. ‘I don’t want you to go,’ she whispered to him. ‘But…’

‘Then I will stay.’ He said it without a second thought. He knew he would stay with her for as long as was needed for her to feel better again. It would sicken him to leave her while she was sad.

‘Whaa?!’ Jaken cried. ‘Stay? Here?! In this village? What do you mean, my lord?!’

Sesshomaru ignored the screaming demon and clarified for Rin’s sake, ‘for a little while.’

The tension slowly eased out of her, though she didn’t let go yet. She simply gave a small sniff and a contented sigh.

* * *

Kaede offered the safety and shelter of her home to Rin for the night, and left the trio in peace. InuYasha and Kagome had not returned from inside the meido yet, and the rest of his troupe were camped by the dry well, awaiting a sign of their return. Sesshomaru was silently thankful for this, and the fact that he didn’t have to endure his half-brother and human comrades for the duration of his promise to stay.

Jaken’s company was the only nuisance he had to suffer through, but he made use of the vassal, instructing him to tend to the fire and prepare some food for Rin.

It was obvious Rin was trying to put on her best brave face. She smiled when Jaken offered her food, and ate as much as she could. But she moved very slowly, and when she thought no one was looking, she stared at her feet with a melancholy gaze. He couldn’t leave while she was unable to smile.

‘You can’t keep being miserable like this, Rin,’ Jaken scolded. ‘If you don’t cheer up, you might as well just come with us.’

Jaken’s scorn didn’t do anything to improve her mood though, and she simply replied with a quiet, ‘hmm.’

‘This sour mood does not suit you Rin,’ Jaken carried on. ‘Not one bit. You should be grateful that Lord Sesshomaru risked life and limb to rescue you from the belly of Naraku. You have been given yet another chance at life because of Lord Sesshomaru!’

‘I know that,’ Rin murmured. She wrapped her arms around her knees, drawing them in to her chest.

‘So why are you being so ungrateful like this, Rin?!’ Jaken cried.

‘I’m not ungrateful!’ Rin shouted back. He outburst only lasted seconds before she curled up on herself again. She added, much quieter, ‘I know I am lucky. And I don’t want to waste the life I’ve been given. That’s why I…’ She trailed off, her voice frail.

‘Well then, make up your mind!’ Jaken shouted back at her. ‘If you want to stay here, then why would you be so sad about it?’

Rin winced, merely at the mention of staying behind.

‘Jaken.’ Sesshomaru commanded the attention of the small youkai, and Jaken turned around to face his lord.

*THWACK*

The back of Sesshomaru’s hand came across the side of Jaken’s head, knocking the imp to the ground and leaving a large bulbous lump on his head. Jaken groaned from the floor, ‘I shall be quiet now, m’lord.’

Rin’s quiet giggle could be heard across the room.

Jaken was right about one thing. The sour mood did not suit Rin at all. The usually happy and energetic girl was quiet and downcast, and while she carried on like this, he didn’t want to leave her. Jaken wasn’t helping her mood, so it would be best if he left them both alone for a while. ‘Jaken,’ Sesshomaru ordered, ‘go fetch some more firewood.’

‘Huh? Oh.’ Jaken pulled himself to his feet and trudged from the room, mumbling to himself, ‘I can see when I’m not needed.’

Rin continued to stare at her toes, her expression unchanged. As much as he didn’t understand the reasoning behind it, he knew that she found comfort when he let her be near him, and she was particularly fond of his mokomoko. Perhaps that would cheer her up.

‘Come sit with me, Rin.’

‘Hm?’ she looked up at the sounds of his voice. Slowly, she rose to her feet and circled around the fire in the centre of the room. As she approached, he held out his right arm, giving her room to sit beside him, resting against his mokomoko. She curled up under his arm and he pulled her in close. ‘Thank you, Lord Sesshomaru,’ she murmured. ‘Master Jaken’s voice was becoming quite tiresome.’

‘Mm.’

Rin sat quietly, still holding her knees to her chest, but as a few minutes passed her breathing started to slow and she relaxed.

‘You don’t have to stay,’ she whispered. ’I know you must be wanting to move on soon.’

She took a deep breath, her body expanding and collapsing in closer to him as she sighed it out. ’Lord Sesshomaru?’ she asked. ‘Could you just stay until I fall asleep?’

Sesshomaru glanced down at her, neatly tucked under his arm. ’If that is what you wish.’

Her body softened. ‘Thank you,’ she whispered. ‘I’m getting sleepy now.’

‘Go to sleep then, Rin.’ It was still early, far earlier than she usually went to sleep, but she had to be exhausted after the long events of the last few days. He was happy to hold her until she was able to relax.

He sat and listened to her breathing. For such a small creature, she made a lot of noise while breathing, although not quite as much as Jaken did. He found a peace in her quiet breathing, particularly while it was slow and relaxed. He had noticed over their time together that her slow breathing usually indicated she was asleep, or at peace at the very least.

‘I have one more question, Lord Sesshomaru,’ she whispered, proving that she was not yet asleep. ‘When you are nearby, would you come to visit me?’

His eyes widened a touch as he looked down at her, surprised she even had to ask. ‘Why do you ask such silly questions?’

She giggled. It was the smallest of sounds, but so familiar to him, and it warmed his heart. ‘Then I’ll stay here and wait for you,’ she murmured. She turned onto her side, head resting at the bend of his hip cushioned by his mokomoko, and flung an arm across his lap. There was a distinct smile on her little lips bringing a peace to her pure gentle face. She was asleep within minutes.

Jaken returned not long after she fell asleep, a heavy glare from Sesshomaru warning him to stay quiet. Obedient, Jaken tossed some more wood on the fire, before curling up to sleep himself.

Sesshomaru didn’t sleep that night. He didn’t even move. It wasn’t until the birds started twittering and light was breaking that he decided it was time to go. He laid Rin down as gently as he could, before nudging Jaken awake with his boot. Ah-Un was waiting for them outside. He pushed forward, no backward glances, with a grumpy Jaken and a sleepy Ah-Un, and no little Rin in tow.


	2. Suffering Losses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inuyasha returns from the meido, without Kagome. Rin is feeling the pain of her decision and tries to comfort Inuyasha.

She woke to the light of the morning, the quiet bustle of someone nearby, and the smell of food. Was it Jaken cooking breakfast? No, Jaken was gone. Lord Sesshomaru was gone.

The ache settled into her chest. She opened her eyes and sat up, rubbing the tiredness away with a little fist before looking around. She was still in the priestess’ house, and the old lady knelt by the fire in the centre of the room, but he was no where to be seen. Lord Sesshomaru was gone.

‘Good morning, child,’ the old lady said. She looked up from the pot of rice she was stirring and smiled kindly. Rin didn’t have the strength to return the smile though.

She wanted to run from the room. She wanted to chase after Lord Sesshomaru, wherever he had gone. She wanted to find him and take it all back. But it would be useless. She didn’t have his keen sense of smell, or even Jaken’s knowledge of the wilderness. She had no way of finding him, and he was probably miles away. ‘He’s gone…’ she murmured. The little girl hung her head, feeling her heart cave in on itself.

‘Aye,’ the old lady said. ‘He left not long before daybreak.’

_He stayed with me that long?_

Rin remembered her words to him from the previous night. She’d asked him to stay until she fell asleep. The knowledge that he had stayed much longer than she had asked brought a glimmer of happiness in her otherwise dark and miserable world.

_Maybe he didn’t really want me to stay behind?_

She hadn’t considered that her decision might’ve caused him pain too, that maybe he wanted her to go with him. Or maybe he agreed with Kaede that it was for the best she stay in the village.

_But he said he would be sad if I died._

Confusion plagued her. Up until now she had been so assured of what she wanted. She always wanted to be by Lord Sesshomaru’s side. Everything had changed now. The only thing she was certain of was that she missed him sorely.

A bowl of rice porridge appeared under her nose. She looked up at the old lady handing the bowl to her. ‘For me?’ she enquired.

Kaede nodded.

‘Thank you.’

Rin took the bowl and placed it on the floor in front of her. The hashi were balanced on the edge of the bowl, but she didn’t have the strength to move her arm. Her whole body felt dull and heavy, as though made of stone, and she was not hungry in the slightest. Kaede sat on the other side of the fire and ate her porridge. Rin could feel her eyes on her, but it made no difference.

‘I will be heading out to collect the children of the village soon,’ the old lady said. ‘Would ye care to join me?’

Rin blinked with wide eyes. ‘Other children?’ she repeated.

‘Aye,’ the priestess said. ‘I’m sure they will be happy to meet ye.’

Rin didn’t have very fond memories of many village children, but she would never forget her days playing with her brothers. They loved to use sticks to pretend to be samurai warriors fighting in battle. Perhaps she could play such games with these children. At least it would be something to distract her from the pain of her loss. She mumbled a quiet, ‘I suppose.’

‘Eat up then,’ she reminded her, nodding towards the bowl of porridge. ‘We have much work to do in restoring the fields.’

Of course, work. Gone were her days of lazing in the sun, splashing in rivers to catch fish and walking with Jaken and Lord Sesshomaru. There probably wouldn’t be time for play either. She looked at the bowl of rice porridge again and picked up the hashi. It had been a long time since she had used hashi and she was out of practice.

* * *

It was three nights before Inuyasha came back. Rin was quietly hoping Kagome would be back with him, she always liked the funny-dressed priestess. But when the group came down the path from where the dry well had disappeared, Kagome wasn’t there.

‘Inuyasha!’ Kaede called out as she stood. ‘What happened? Where is Kagome?’

Inuyasha winced and cast his gaze down. ‘She… went home.’ His voice was quiet, strained and frail. ‘The well is sealed.’

Rin knew enough from what Kaede had taught her over the past three days that the bone-eater’s well is where Kagome came from, and she had a home in a distant land on the other side of the well. She knew from Inuyasha’s forlorn expression and pained tone that this meant Kagome would not be coming back.

Kaede instructed her to stay in the field and carry on sewing seeds with the other children until the sun started to dip toward the horizon. Kaede left the children there and followed Inuyasha and his troupe back toward the village.

_Inuyasha… I’m sorry you lost someone special to you._

* * *

Inuyasha was in a foul mood when Rin returned to Kaede’s house that evening. He sat in the corner, arms folded over the Tetsusaiga, head bowed and eyes closed. Sango, Miroku, and Shippo were no where to be seen. Rin remained quiet as she entered the house, bearing the basket of wild daikon, but Inuyasha must’ve smelt her presence and growled darkly, ‘what is she doing here?’

‘Inuyasha,’ Kaede said in a dark warning tone. ‘Rin is here for her own safety.’ Rin set down the basket and set about separating the greens from the roots on the few daikon she had collected.

Inuyasha gave a disgruntled hmph. ‘So where’s Sesshomaru?’

Rin didn’t have to answer. She was grateful that Kaede spoke for her. ‘He left,’ she answered, ‘three days past.’

‘What?!’ Inuyasha shouted. ‘He left you behind? That arrogant—’

Kaede cut him off with a stern cough to clear her throat. ‘Nay, Inuyasha,’ she said, ‘it was no easier for Lord Sesshomaru than it was for young Rin.’

‘Ha,’ he barked with sarcastic amusement. ‘Yeah right, he doesn’t even have a heart. Why would it be difficult for him to leave a human?’

‘That’s quite enough Inuyasha.’ Kaede gave the order, and Inuyasha fell silent.

_You’re wrong Inuyasha. Lord Sesshomaru does have a heart. I know he does._

Rin didn’t feel any anger towards him. He was, after all, suffering badly. She just hoped one day that Inuyasha would be able to see the good, kind, wonderful side of Lord Sesshomaru that she knew.

* * *

She rolled over again, positioning herself on the one warm spot of the shikibuton. The fireplace glowed in the darkness and the moonlight poured in the windows. Rin was still not accustomed to sleeping under a roof. She missed seeing the stars when she woke at night. She missed the constant rumbling of Jaken’s snoring. She missed having Lord Sesshomaru’s mokomoko to lay her head against on the nights she couldn’t sleep, the slow steady pulse of blood under her ear through the thick soft fur. She missed the way he would never let Jaken see her cuddling the tail end of his mokomoko, but as long as Jaken didn’t see it, he didn’t mind.

A crashing noise outside made her heart jump, the sound of logs or small trees falling to the ground. It wasn’t loud, but it seemed louder because of the still of the night. None of the others stirred.

A clunking sound continued, a sound that Rin was familiar with. Someone outside was stacking firewood, the heavy thunk of the wood and the knock of the logs against the wall of the house being the key clues. Inuyasha had been missing for a few hours now, no doubt he was the one now stacking firewood outside.

He was lonely.

Rin crawled out of the bed. She wasn’t quite sure what she was going to do, but she knew Inuyasha was feeling low, and perhaps she could offer him some comfort. She poked her head out the doorway and sure enough she could see his red kimono just around the corner of the house, near the wood pile. She stepped out as quietly as she could and approached him. ‘You can’t sleep either, can you?’ she asked.

Inuyasha wasn’t surprised by her sudden appearance, shooting a glance at her. ‘What are you doing awake?’

She thought it would be obvious, but he probably wasn’t as wise or intuitive as the man she was used to. She answered quietly, ‘I miss Lord Sesshomaru.’

‘Hmph.’ Inuyasha gave a low disgruntled huff, and continued stacking the wood. He wasn’t being so quiet now, each log dropping with a heavy clunk, and his arm moved with short jerky movements. ‘I hope he misses you too.’

It was a funny way of saying it. What did he mean? Did he say it because he hoped Kagome was thinking of him? Rin asked, unabashed, ‘Do you miss Kagome?’

‘Ng—’ He hesitated, placing another log on the stack but then leaving his hand there. ‘Yeah,’ he murmured. ‘But, I know her family needs her too.’ He stared at the wood stack, motionless, seeing something Rin could only wonder about.

She crouched down beside him, wrapping an arm around her knees and drawing a pattern in the dirt. The ume blossom pattern that adorned Lord Sesshomaru’s kimono. ‘I guess neither of us can be with the people we love,’ she whispered. She didn’t say it aloud very often, but she knew deep in her heart, she loved her Lord Sesshomaru. Everything from his calm demeanour and relaxed soul, to the funny way he handled Jaken and how he always showed her the utmost kindness and respect. She had never known anyone as fearless or strong as he. It wasn’t quite the same as the love her parents had for each other, or that Miroku and Sango had, or even Inuyasha and Kagome, nor was it the same love that she had for her parents before their untimely passing, but she loved him, nonetheless, with all her being. 

‘Huh?!’ Inuyasha’s eyes widened, turning to look at her. ‘You—? You love him?’

Rin nodded, adding another flower to the pattern in the dirt. ‘He is my closest friend,’ she whispered. Tears welled in her eyes, thinking of her favourite person, wondering if he was thinking of her too. Had he stopped for the night? Was he sitting with Ah-Un tonight? Was Jaken’s snoring bothering him again? ‘Even Master Jaken,’ she murmured. ‘I miss him too.’

Inuyasha placed a hand on her shoulder, squeezing her arm with a comforting warmth. ‘If he means that much to you,’ he said softly, ‘I’m sure he’ll come back.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A relatively short chapter. Hoping to be able to update this one regularly. Let me know your thoughts or comments!


	3. The Long Awaited Wedding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kohaku visits the village on the day of his sister’s wedding, bringing some small comfort to Rin.

Bells chimed in the air and incense wafted through the village. It was a special day, a ceremonious day. The day of the long awaited wedding had finally arrived.

Rin was unaware that Sango and Miroku were engaged to be wed before Naraku’s defeat, but when she heard the happy news that a wedding would be held it gave her something to look forward to. It was less than a lunar cycle after the defeat of Naraku when the ceremony was scheduled. Of course, it meant that there was much more work in preparing for the feast that would follow the ceremony, but her busy days kept her mind occupied. Most of all, she was happy when she heard that Kohaku would be coming to visit for the day.

Sango looked beautiful in white. They stayed in Lady Kaede’s house to prepare Sango for the ceremony. Lady Kaede arranged the hair covering atop Sango’s head while Rin sat and picked sakura blossoms off a branch to shower the newly wed couple following the ceremony.

There was a knock on the wooden frame of the doorway and a familiar boyish voice called out, ‘sister? Are you in there?’

‘Kohaku?!’ Sango’s joy filled the room.

The bamboo curtain pulled back and Kohaku’s smiling face peeked into the house. ‘Sister?’

‘Kohaku!’ Sango leapt forward and grabbed her younger brother, pulling him into the room and into her embrace. ‘I’m so glad you came!’

‘Sango,’ he murmured, face turning beet red as he was clutched to her body. ‘Of course I came.’

Sango drew back, beaming brightly at her brother with little tears in her eyes. Kohaku returned a meagre smile, but it was still plain to see he was very happy.

‘Come now, Sango,’ Lady Kaede said, interrupting their happy reunion. ‘We must finish preparing ye for the ceremony.’

‘Right, of course,’ Sango said. She dropped her brother’s hand and crouched down before the priestess again.

‘Rin?’

Kohaku, free from his sister’s embrace, noticed the little girl sitting by the wall. She smiled up at her old friend, the first time she had smiled since Lord Sesshoumaru left. ‘Hi Kohaku,’ she said. ‘It’s so good to see you again.’

Kohaku was genuinely shocked, that much was obvious with his mouth hanging agape. ‘What are you doing here, Rin?’ He looked around. ‘Where’s Lord Sesshomaru?’

‘Oh…’ It was always the first question anyone asked when they saw Rin. No matter how many times she endured the question, it still brought an ache to her heart. ‘He’s…’

‘I think the questions may best be saved for later, Kohaku,’ Lady Kaede interrupted, as always dutifully protecting Rin from the painful questioning. ‘You must go and get ready yourself.’

‘Oh.’ Kohaku’s face started to turn pink as he looked down as his rough and worn kosode. ‘Yeah, I suppose I should.’

‘InuYasha and Miroku are at the house down the path to the left,’ Lady Kaede advised. With a smile and a wave, Kohaku rushed back out as quickly as he came in.

Rin resumed picking the sakura blossoms off the branches, gently laying the flowers in the basket. She was happy to at least see Kohaku again, even if he wasn’t the one she really wanted to see.

* * *

The room filled with chatter, laughter, and the smell of wonderful food. Rin was somewhat proud, the umeboshi that everyone loved was the one she had prepared herself, and she had caught all those fish by herself as well, much to Lady Kaede’s surprise.

Rin sat next to Kohaku at the feast. It wasn’t really the correct order, but they were all friends and everyone could see the difference in her demeanour when she was near him. She smiled more near him, and they giggled and talked and shared with each other what they had been doing since they parted ways, in between listening to the conversations surrounding them.

It wasn’t until late in the night, or possibly early morning, that Kohaku asked the question that had been plaguing him all day. He took a breath in for courage before murmuring quietly to Rin, ‘You’re not just here for the wedding, are you?’

‘Mn…’ Rin murmured, her head bowing to look at her toes. ‘No.’ She had done well not to think of Lord Sesshomaru for most of the day, but Kohaku’s curiosity brought him back to the forefront of her mind.

‘Did Lord Sesshomaru…?’ he asked, but his question trailed off.

‘It was my decision to stay,’ she mumbled. She hugged her knees to her chest and rocked back and forth, pressing her toes into the floor and bouncing gently off them as she explained, ‘After what happened at his mother’s palace, I know he was thinking about it a lot.’ She stopped her little rocking. It was taking too much energy and the pain she felt in her chest thinking about Lord Sesshomaru was draining. ‘He said that…’ she murmured, ‘that he would be sad, if I died again.’

‘Oh.’ Kohaku had witnessed what happened at Lord Sesshomaru’s mother’s palace, he had been beside her when they were swallowed by the hell hound, and was there when she awoke to Lord Sesshomaru’s gentle touch. He had witnessed everything Rin hadn’t, and seen the pain on Lord Sesshomaru’s face when he heard that Rin had died, when he discovered she couldn’t be saved. ‘So you chose to stay here?’ he asked. ‘With Inuyasha and the others?

Rin nodded. ‘Lady Kaede asked if I would stay with her.’

‘Oh,’ he said again. ‘That’s nice of her.’

Silence settled between them. The pain that his questioning had caused her was obvious, and he wanted to say something to help take her mind off of it.

‘Do you like living here?’

Rin was still quiet. She was still consumed in her own thought, remembering the day that she last saw Lord Sesshomaru; the way he took her hands in his soft fingers and asked her what she wanted; the way he held her when she threw her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder; his promise to visit when he was nearby. Village life was nice, but it did not bring her the same joy she felt when she was with him. She had to put on a brave face though, and pretend to be happy, so she gave the best smile she could, a wavering curl of her little lips, and murmured, ‘I guess.’

Kohaku wasn’t fooled. He leant forward to try to look her in the eye and asked gently, ‘but not really?’

Rin turned her head, hiding her eyes from him. This was supposed to be a happy day, but seeing everyone smiling and happy families reunited to join the celebrations only made her feel even more lonely. ‘I miss Lord Sesshomaru,’ she whispered, and as soon as she uttered the words aloud, the sharp pain in her chest intensified and the hot tears spilled from her eyes. It was supposed to be a happy day, but she couldn’t feel happiness if she wasn’t with him. ‘I’m sorry Kohaku,’ she murmured and rushed to her feet before scarpering from the room.

Kohaku felt awful. He hadn’t meant to make Rin cry. He looked around the room; no one else had noticed her leave. Most of the adults had been drinking sake for a while. Since no one was looking Kohaku also swiftly stood and slipped out of the house.

Rin was down the path a little, her hand resting on the trunk of a large tree, looking out at the sky. A crescent moon was rising far on the horizon, indicating it was well past the midnight hour. It was the same crescent shape that adorned Lord Sesshomaru’s forehead. Perhaps somewhere in the wide land he was looking up at the same moon she was.

‘Rin,’ Kohaku said softly as he came up to stand by the young girl. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you upset.’

‘It’s not your fault.’ She looked at the older boy and gave a meagre smile, but it quickly wilted. ‘I just worry,’ she admitted. ‘He said he would come visit me, but… what if he never comes back for me?’ She looked out wistfully at the moon, shining over the mountains she had once loved travelling with Lord Sesshomaru. She wondered if he was somewhere out there wandering the mountains, if he was sleeping or resting, if he was still nearby, if he was thinking of her too, or if he had already moved on. ‘What if he’s forgotten all about me?’

Kohaku placed a hand on her shoulder, his arm draping across her back. His gentle touch was warm in contrast to the cool night air, and comforting at the back of her aching chest. ‘I don’t think he would ever forget about you, Rin.’

She raised her hand and placed it on top of his on her opposite shoulder. Kohaku hadn’t travelled with Lord Sesshomaru for long, nor did he know him as well as she or Jaken did, but she still took comfort in his words.

‘You know,’ Kohaku added, ’I don’t think Lord Sesshomaru would want you to be sad.’

A small warmth she had not felt in a long time touched her heart, and she smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short chapter, but the next one will make up for it. Kohaku and Rin’s friendship has always been an interesting one. It could go somewhere, or it may not. Who knows?


	4. The Lord’s Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sesshomaru returns for his first visit, bringing joy back into little Rin’s life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to give honourable mention to tumblr user screamibgdodo for the HC that Rin likes to watch Sesshomaru eat. Used with permission. OP here:  
> https://screamibgdodo.tumblr.com/post/621082872262033408/sesshorins-non-physical-gestures-of

Rin knelt by Kaede, watching intently as she prepared the soup. She had been learning a lot about the various foods prepared in village life. She had added the firmer vegetables and roots first, and was saving the leaves to the end. Rin turned the three small fish grilling on their sticks by the fire. She knew enough about grilling fish to not need Kaede’s assistance with that.

There was a voice outside, shrill and whiny and very familiar. Perhaps she was just hearing things? She had to at least go and check. Without another thought she ran from the house into the afternoon twilight.

There, far down the path, came Ah-Un, Jaken, and Lord Sesshomaru.

‘Lord Sesshomaru!!’

Rin bolted down the path, racing as fast as her legs could carry her. She felt as though she could fly, seeing him again. Her eyes burned with hot tears and her chest hurt, but it was a pain much different to the one she was accustomed to. This was the pain of her chest overflowing with joy.

She came to a jumping halt in front of Lord Sesshomaru. She had in fact wanted to jump into his arms, but she knew he did not care for such physical affection. It had been so long, but she still noticed the little curve in his lips and softening of his eyes as she came to stand in front of him. ‘I’m so happy you’re back Lord Sesshomaru,’ she said. Her voice was a little higher than usual, strained by the tears in her eyes. ‘It’s so wonderful to see you.’

‘I am glad to see you as well, Rin.’ There was a softness in his voice, a happiness that she still recognised, one that had taken her a long time to learn, that most other people would never notice, but she would never forget. It made her so overwhelmingly happy to know that he wanted to see her again.

‘I hope you are happy to see me too, Rin?’

Master Jaken’s abrasive voice grumbled at her as he walked around in front of Lord Sesshoumaru. Rin didn’t care about causing any embarrassment to the little imp demon and wanted to show her elation at seeing her friend again. She dropped to her knees and scooped Jaken up in her arms. ‘I am, Master Jaken!’ She squeezed him tight and swung him back and forth before releasing the squirming imp, ignoring his griping and protests, and asked, ‘Have you been well?’

‘Of course!’ Jaken stated, as though it were only so obvious. ‘Lord Sesshomaru and I have been able to travel far and wide with _you_ slowing us down.’

It was like old times. Jaken scolding her for something that she didn’t really do. ‘Oh,’ she said, feigning surprise. She said in a flat tone heavy with sarcasm, ‘I didn’t realise I was such a burden to you.’

‘You never realised?!’ Jaken did not get the sarcasm. He was never very good at picking it up, either from Rin or Lord Sesshomaru. Rin got a good giggle out of it though as Jaken carried on, ‘How ignorant of you, you little—’

*THONK!*

Before Jaken could finish he was knocked to the ground with a swift flick of Sesshomaru’s foot against his head, leaving him with a bulbous lump and a dizzying headache.

Sesshomaru held out his hand for Rin. She gently took it to help herself up from her knees then dusted off the dirt from her kosode. ‘I trust you have been well?’ he asked.

‘Yes,’ she answered with a bright smile up at him. ‘Lady Kaede takes good care of me.’

‘Good.’

He didn’t say anything further.

She didn’t want him to leave just yet, so she asked, ‘We’re about to have our evening meal, would you like to join us?’

‘A meal? With lowly humans?!’ Jaken repeated, springing up from his comatose state to stand in front of Lord Sesshomaru’s honour. ‘You must be joking!’ he cried. ‘Lord Sesshomaru is far too important to waste time watching you humans—’

Once again he was stifled, this time by Lord Sesshomaru’s boot pressing him flat into the dirt and walking over him. Rin knew that it probably wasn’t what Lord Sesshomaru wanted to do, but she was happy to just be able to spend some more time with him, and of course she’d fetch him something to eat. She slid her hand into his much large one, smiling up at the tall demon lord, and walked with him down the path back to the house.

Jaken eventually got up, grumbling to himself, and followed with Ah-Un.

Rin lead him into the house, pulling back the bamboo screen. Sesshomaru, much taller than Rin, took hold of it himself and pulled the screen back before following the little girl inside. The old priestess was stirring a pot of soup over the fire, and Inuyasha sat in the corner, head bowed and holding the Tetsusaiga.

‘Wait here, Lord Sesshoumaru,’ Rin said, releasing his hand. ‘I’ll go get you some fruits.’ She dashed out of the house again, almost knocking over Jaken as he entered.

‘Lord Sesshoumaru,’ the priestess said as she spooned bowls of soup out. ‘I am honoured by your presence in my home.’ She gestured to the space beside her, in the corner furthest from Inuyasha, and added, ‘please.’

It did not escape the demon lord that Inuyasha’s shoulders were shaking with a dark snicker. He shot a glance up, a mischievous twinkle in his eye. ‘Never thought I’d see the day you sat down for a meal with humans.’

‘It must be your lucky day, Inuyasha.’ Sesshomaru drew his swords still sheathed from their place in his sash and laid them on the ground as he sat, before folding his arms inside his sleeves.

‘How dare you?’ Jaken snapped. ‘You insolent half demon!’

‘Would ye care for some dinner, Master Jaken?’ the priestess interrupted.

Jaken stopped. His eyes finally landed on the pot of soup in the middle of the room. He sniffed the air and his mouth started watering. Kaede took the lid from a small square wooden box, and little tears formed in Jaken’s eyes. ‘Is that…’ he stammered out, ‘umeboshi?’

‘Aye,’ Kaede said as she took one of the pickled plums and placed it atop the rice in the first bowl.

‘Ohhh,’ Jaken murmured, something of a groan at the sight of the food before him. ‘And that’s…’ he asked, pointing at the fireplace, ‘grilled fish?’

‘Those are mine!’ Inuyasha snapped. ‘Back off!’

Kaede ignored him and answered, ‘aye. And there is enough to share.’ Kaede took one of the fish and placed it a top the first bowl to finish it, before offering it out to the high-ranking demon first. ‘Lord Sesshomaru?’

Sesshomaru didn’t move, leaving Jaken to answer for him. ‘Lord Sesshomaru does not eat these peasant foods!’ he snapped, ‘don’t you know that?’

‘Then can I tempt ye, Master Jaken?’ Kaede turned to Jaken and offered the bowl to him.

‘Oh…’ Jaken’s face glazed over as his tiny arms wrestled with themselves over whether or not to accept the food.

‘Please,’ Kaede said, ‘eat.’

‘Well,’ Jaken murmured, tentatively reaching for the bowl, ‘if you insist.’ Before he had a chance to change his mind he quickly took the bowl and sat down, clicking the hashi twice before diving in, filling his cheeks with food.

‘I want to know how Rin is faring, priestess.’

‘Of course,’ Kaede said, as she filled another bowl and held it out to InuYasha. He took the bowl and bit into the fish first. ‘She is well,’ she answered. ‘For some time after ye left she was quite melancholy. However, she has improved over recent days. She aids me in caring for the young children of the village, and collecting food. She has started to learn to read and write.’

‘Good.’

‘Keh,’ Inuyasha scoffed. ‘Like you care anyway. What are you even doing here?’ He waved his stick of fish about as he spoke and pointed it accusingly at his brother. ‘You left her here. Are you gonna take her with you this time?’ His voice rose with his anger, picking up that snarky grating tone that made Sesshomaru’s ears twitch in agony. ‘I guess not, you were glad to ditch her here. You know she’s gonna be miserable as soon as you leave again, right? You coming back here only hurts her all over again!’

Inuyasha appeared to be finished with his tirade, for the moment, so Sesshomaru responded, ‘it is Rin’s choice if she wishes to stay or leave.’

‘Yeah right,’ Inuyasha snarked. ‘You just guilt trip her into thinking she has a choice. You don’t want her around anyway.’

Inuyasha’s snide remarks didn’t faze Sesshomaru at all though. He answered as plainly as possible, ‘it is none of your concern, Inuyasha.’

Inuyasha growled. Sesshomaru’s dispassionate answers always seemed to anger him more than the times he engaged in him in battle. It was hard to argue with someone who wouldn’t respond to the argument.

‘I do not believe she is ready to leave yet, Lord Sesshomaru,’ Kaede interjected before Inuyasha could whip out another argument. ‘There is still much for her to learn.’

While Kaede’s argument fared better than Inuyasha’s, Sesshomaru was still aware that it was not his place to dictate to Rin what she should or shouldn’t do. He repeated, this time for the old woman’s sake, ‘it is Rin’s decision.’

Kaede nodded to him in respect of his affirmation and said nothing more.

A few quiet moments passed before Rin came rushing back, bearing a bowl of fruit for Lord Sesshomaru; a peach, a pear, and some grapes. ‘Here, Lord Sesshomaru!’ Rin said, proffering the bowl as she dropped to her knees in front of him. ‘I’ve been growing some melons, but they’re not ripe yet. I picked the best momo and nashi for you, I can peel them if you like?’

He took the bowl graciously and said, ‘that won’t be necessary, thank you Rin.’

Inuyasha would’ve said his reply was cold, callous and uncaring, but Rin found the warmth in his tone and knew she was appreciated. It made her smile as a warmth spread out from her chest through her entire body. She watched as he placed the bowl in his lap between his crossed legs and took the pear. Using his sharp claw, he sliced a cheek off the pear, then ran his claw lengthways to cut off a length of the pear cheek, no thicker than her little finger.

Rin had always marvelled at the way Lord Sesshomaru ate. He was so refined and graceful. Ever since she first met him, she had adored the elegant way he conducted himself in everything he did, and eating was no exception. She didn’t see him eat for weeks after they met, but one afternoon she noticed him eating a handful of budo grapes and couldn’t help but watch. That day was the first he seemed mildly unnerved by her curiosity, and even asked her what she was looking at, but when she had explained that she admired the way he could make such a mundane and ordinary task seem beautiful, he said no more. Even when Jaken scolded her, crying out that it was rude to stare at Lord Sesshomaru, especially while he was eating, he only told Jaken to be quiet. Rin delighted in watching Lord Sesshomaru eat, such a humane task that he somehow managed to make seem incandescent. She watched again as he swiftly slid the small slice of pear between his lips. He gave barely any movement as he chewed and swallowed, before carving another fine slice from the pear.

‘Rin.’

Kaede called her name, interrupting her awe-struck stupor. She held out a bowl for Rin, so she quickly jumped up and graciously took the bowl before sitting down beside Lord Sesshomaru to eat. She asked before taking her first mouthful, ‘I hope you’ve been well, Lord Sesshomaru?’

As always, Jaken spoke for him, swallowing down a large mouthful of rice and fish. ‘Lord Sesshomaru has been busy slaying demons that have resurfaced since Naraku’s defeat,’ he said. ‘It has been quite burdensome.’

‘Oh,’ Rin said. It was no wonder that he would prefer for her to stay in the safety of the village. ‘I bet Lord Sesshomaru makes it look easy though,’ she praised.

‘Of course!’ Jaken squawked. ‘No one compares to our Lord Sesshoumaru!’

Inuyasha scoffed from the corner. ‘Yeah, whatever you say.’

* * *

Over the course of the evening as the sky darkened and the sounds of the day faded, Jaken regaled Rin on the events of their travels since they had parted ways. He mostly refrained from making mention of Rin being ‘left behind’, and the few times it nearly occurred he received a stern glare from Sesshomaru before quickly correcting himself in a panic. Rin didn’t seem to mind, even giggling when Master Jaken started sweating, thinking fast how to rephrase what he wanted to say. Mostly though, she just enjoyed being with Lord Sesshoumaru again and listening to the marvellous feats he had accomplished.

After the meal was finished Rin collected the bowls from everyone. It was her normal routine to take them to the stream to rinse them out and clean them for the next meal, but tonight Kaede asked Inuyasha. Surprisingly, Inuyasha didn’t protest, likely keen to have an excuse to leave the room after having to endure Jaken’s riveting tales of his brother. He snatched the stack of bowls up and left without another word.

Kaede also excused Rin from joining her in her evening prayer routine, instead allowing her time to spend with Lord Sesshomaru and Master Jaken. The senior priestess bowed to Sesshomaru and once again thanked him for honouring her with his presence before heading out with her lantern, up towards the shrine.

Jaken continued to talk for a while, but when he mentioned for the third time that Lord Sesshomaru was fortunate to be without a human child in his travelling party, Sesshomaru made the decision it was time for him to shut up. He instructed Jaken to taken Ah-Un to the stream to water him and find some fish for the dragon to eat. Begrudgingly, Jaken took his leave, mumbling to himself as he left the house.

Rin remained with Lord Sesshomaru, the soft crackling of the fire and his peaceful energy bringing calm to the room. She had spent a good few hours giggling and talking with Master Jaken. Her heart and mind were at ease when she was with her favourite companions. It was as though the pain she had experience since he last left had never even happened.

A small fear started to creep into her mind again. While things felt as though they were back to normal again, it wouldn’t stay that way for long. ‘Lord Sesshomaru?’ she asked quietly. ‘Are you going to leave again soon?’

He gave a small ‘hm’, one that she had come to learn typically meant _yes_. It was an inevitability that he would leave again, but she had only hoped it would not be so soon. ‘Do you wish to stay here?’

Rin leant back against the wall beside him and brought her knees up into the circle of her arms. ‘I want to come with you again,’ she said, ‘but… it’s not safe, is it?’ She still clung to the memory of their last parting, when he told her that yes, he would be sad if she were to die. If it was too dangerous for her to travel with him, then it would be better for her to stay behind again.

‘It may never be safe.’

His words, although soft in her ears, brought a sharp pain to her chest. She hadn’t realised just how much she had hoped that she’d be able to leave with him again, but nothing had changed about the situation. She tried to take comfort that he wanted to her to be safe, that he was asking her to stay behind to protect her as he had done so many times in the past. Only now, she had to wait much longer before he would return for her.

‘The priestess said you have been learning a lot.’

She smiled brightly up at him and nodded with vigor. ‘ Mm-hm, I have.’

‘Do you enjoy learning from her?’

Rin paused to think for a moment about the question. Lady Kaede’s teachings were often simple and made sense, and she never complained when Rin asked questions. She also found a strange joy when learning about various plants, herbs and flowers. ‘I think so,’ Rin answered.

Sesshomaru gave a small relaxed ‘hm’, pleased that his Rin was at least enjoying some part of her human life. ‘There is much more she can teach you.’

It did not pass by Rin’s keen attention that he was happy she was learning new things. ‘Do you want me to learn from her?’ she asked. ‘The things like how to read and write?’

Lord Sesshomaru was quiet for a moment. Rin waited patiently, watching as he contemplated his response. Eventually, he looked away and said, ‘it is your decision, Rin.’

Rin couldn’t hide her disappointed, ‘oh.’ Secretly, she had hoped that he would tell her she could join him again in his travels, but nothing in their situation nor the world around them had changed. Perhaps he did want her to learn from Lady Kaede, but simply did not want to force her if she didn’t want to. Yes, that sounded right. ‘I will stay then,’ Rin affirmed. ‘A little longer.’

Peaceful silence settled between them. The warmth that Lord Sesshomaru had brought back into her life was already starting to fade, once again being replaced with the dull ache in her chest that his absence left. She was not ready for him to leave.

She looked up at her Lord, admiring his beautifully striking features; his silken silver hair, porcelain skin, colourful markings and warm but distant eyes. She glanced across the room, wondering what he could’ve been staring at, but found nothing of interest that could’ve captured his attention. Perhaps, like usual, he was staring at something no one else could see. She already felt so distant from him. She was not ready for him to leave.

‘Lord Sesshomaru?’ she asked softly. ‘Could you stay until I fall asleep?’

He turned his head to look at her beside him, blinking up at him with wide brown eyes. He could never refuse his Rin’s request, especially when she needed comfort. He held his right hand out to her, across his body. ‘Come here, Rin.’

Her little face broke out into a huge smile. She quickly jumped to her feet and dashed around to his other side. He moved his mokomoko, creating a circle of space by his side for her to curl up into, and she sat, nuzzling her head into the warm fluff draped over his shoulder. He had never allowed her to be this close to him during their travels, not that she had ever dared to ask, but she thoroughly enjoyed their new ritual, warm and content by his side.

She felt a movement in his body and opened her eyes, wondering if he was not quite comfortable. What she found instead was Lord Sesshomaru holding out his left hand, a delicate golden bracelet slightly smaller than his palm in his hand. ‘Huh?’ She tilted her head, leaning forward to inspect the bracelet. It was a complete circle of an even thickness about as wide as her thumb. Embossed on the flat outer side of the bracelet was a familiar pattern repeating three times around the circle; three ume blossoms conjoined in hexagonal shapes. It was beautiful and simple, but also rich, well polished and likely highly expensive. There were small tarnishes and scratches in the surface, indicating it was not new. ‘Is that for me?’

‘Yes.’

Rin’s eyes sparkled as she sat forward and lifted the bracelet from his palm. It was firm but very light. She turned it over between her fingers, inspecting the bracelet from all angles. ‘It’s beautiful!’ It felt far to beautiful for her to even touch, let alone to wear, but she had to try it on at least once. She easily slipped the bracelet over her little hand and held out her arm, admiring her very first piece of jewellery.

‘It is not for every day wear,’ Lord Sesshomaru instructed. ‘Keep it for special occasions.’

The bracelet hung from her outstretched arm, more than double the size of her wrist. No doubt if she were to wear it anywhere it would easily fall off. ‘It’s a little big,’ she commented, dreading how terrified she would feel if she were to ever lose it.

‘For now,’ he said. ‘You will grow quickly.’ He placed a small wooden box on the floor in front of her, slightly larger than the bracelet. A box for safe keeping. ‘Know that no matter how far apart we are, you will always hold a part of me.’

Rin’s heart filled with warmth again. She cherished the gift, not for it’s value or beauty, but because it was from her Lord Sesshomaru. She was no longer afraid to let him leave, knowing that whenever she would feel sad or lonely she would be able to see his gift and think of him. ‘I love it,’ she whispered. ‘Thank you, my Lord.’

She laid her head down against his mokomoko again and placed her hand on his leg, the bracelet resting on her forearm. The beautiful golden ring shone in the dim firelight, shining the way his eyes did when he gazed up at the sun. She closed her eyes and relaxed with a deep breath, content in her Lord’s embrace.


	5. Village Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rin is growing accustomed to her life in the village, learning from Kaede and interacting with other children.

She woke easily, taking in the cool morning air. Her little arms stretched above her head, and her legs, feet and toes away from her body with a soft, ‘mm.’ The air smelled clean and the earth damp from the rains overnight. Another dawn was on it’s way.

Rin’s stomach grumbled. As usual, her hunger had woken her. Since coming to live in the village and eating regularly every day she found that her stomach grumbled a lot more than it ever did in her travels with Lord Sesshomaru. She would get up soon and start preparing breakfast for herself, Lady Kaede, Inuyasha, and Shippo. But first, she needed her morning routine.

The little girl rolled onto her stomach and reached out behind her head rest for the small wooden box, her gift from Lord Sesshomaru. She drew the small box closer and lifted the lid to see the golden bracelet still safe, shining in the darkness. She touched the edge of it, the cool metal on her fingertips bringing warmth to her heart.

_Know that no matter how far apart we are, you will always hold a part of me._

Rin cherished the gift with every fibre of her being, and the soft words Lord Sesshomaru had given accompanying the gift. Every day she started her morning ritual by checking on the bracelet, making sure it was safe, and to remind herself that no matter where her Lord was, he was still with her. She knew that one day he would be back, and maybe next time she would be ready to go with him again. For now though, she had her memories and dreams of him.

She placed the lid back on the box and tucked it back in the corner for safe keeping, before jumping up out of the futon. Time to start the day.

* * *

‘Be carefully of that one, child.’

Rin stopped reaching for the purple-flowered wild plant at Lady Kaede’s command. ‘Oh,’ she murmured. She crouched down and leant in closer for a better look. The cluster of purple flowers hung in rows from the stem, the star-shaped petals drooping down over each other. The leaves were spiky, thin and weed-like, sprouting from underneath the branches of flowers. ‘What is it?’

‘Yama-torikabuto. The bird’s helmet.’ Lady Kaede approached over her shoulder and knelt down beside her. ‘In small doses it is good for relieving a chill or mild illness.’ She pulled a cloth from the fold of her kimono as she added, ‘However, in a larger dose it could take down a wolf or small bear. Demon slayers dip their arrows and spearheads in a paste made from this herb to increase their potency.’

‘Oh.’

Lady Kaede passed the cloth to Rin. ‘Hold this in your hand,’ she instructed. Rin took the cloth, laying it over her whole hand. ’Pull it here,’ Lady Kaede added, pointing at the base of the plant, ‘from the root.’

With the cloth protecting her hand, Rin carefully reached for the plant, as close to the bottom of the stem as she could.

‘That’s the way,’ Lady Kaede encouraged.

Rin tugged the plant gently and it came loose from the soil. She shook the loose dirt from the roots before gathering it in the protective cloth and handing it over to Lady Kaede.

‘Thank you Rin,’ the priestess said. The smile she gave Rin made her chest swell with pride, knowing she had done well. ‘I’m sure Sango will know of a way to prepare this plant safely.’ Lady Kaede folded the plant in the cloth and placed it in the basket alongside the other herbs and plants they had collected during their trip through the forest.

Walking barefoot through the trees felt so nostalgic to Rin. She longed for the days she walked such paths with Lord Sesshomaru, squawking Jaken by her side and faithful Ah-Un trudging behind them. But she had managed to find happiness in her days, holding on to her memories and making new ones, learning new lessons and discovering things about an ordinary life.

She spotted another plant, one with vibrant pink flowers shaped like a tiny snakes mouth hanging open. She rushed up, pointing at the pretty plant and asked, ‘what about this one? It’s so pretty!’

‘Aye,’ Lady Kaede said as she slowly followed after her. ‘Mirukubetchi. It shan’t harm ye. It grows wild in many places.’

Rin dropped to her knees and picked a few stems of the plants, pulling out the roots where she could. She gathered up the stems and placed them in Lady Kaede’s basket, while the lady explained, ‘commonly used to increase vitality. Some men will use this plant if they are having trouble conceiving a child.’

The little girl tilted her head up at her teacher, confused and curious. ‘How would a plant help a man make a baby?’ She had seen Sango in the village, her belly large and swollen with her unborn child. She wondered if perhaps the plant could make Miroku carry a baby instead, and pictured him walking side by side with his wife, holding hands and swaggering with a large baby bump. Was that how the plant worked?

‘Oh,’ Lady Kaede murmured. ‘I suppose ye may not know the process of conceiving yet?’

Rin shook her head and murmured between her pursed lips, ‘mm-mn.’ Was it even possible for a man to carry a baby? Or was it only women? Why was it only women? What part did a man play? All she knew was that a man and a woman were required to make a baby, and from Miroku’s jesting over recent days, he seemed to enjoy whatever he needed to do to make a baby.

‘Ah.’ Kaede tapped her bow on the ground. ‘Perhaps that may be a lesson best saved for another day.’

‘Oh.’ She sounded disappointed, but the child’s curiosity did not diminish. She wanted to ask more questions, but wasn’t even sure where to start. Sango’s baby would be coming within weeks, surely she and Miroku knew how to make a child. Rin asked the first thing that came to mind, pointing at the pink flower. ‘Did Miroku use this when making Sango’s baby?’

Lady Kaede coughed loudly, clearing her through. ‘Ahh,’ she said, looking down towards the ground at her side. ‘Nay, I think not.’ Before Rin could get in another question, her teacher quickly raised her head and pointed a way down the path, exclaiming, ‘child, look! Some more wild daikon.’

‘Oh! I’ll get it!’ She scrambled to her feet and hurried down the path, only realising as she rushed away that she had been distracted from her questions. She giggled to herself, knowing full well that Lady Kaede did not want her to ask anything further. The priestess had a gentler technique than Lord Sesshomaru or Master Jaken ever did, but Rin knew when she was asking too much, and when to stop.

Perhaps, she would ask Sango and Miroku later how to make a baby.

* * *

It was early afternoon by the time Rin had finished her work with Lady Kaede and was allowed to go play with the other village children. When she had first begun this new daily ritual of interacting with the village children she had needed Lady Kaede’s strong encouragement, but over time she had found that she enjoyed playing games and making friends. While it always made her stomach twist into a knot having to approach other children and ask if she could join their games, it was better than being alone all the time, so she headed into the village.

The children gathered in the centre of the village near the water well between a few of the houses. The four boys stood back to back in the middle of a circle they’d drawn in the dirt, playing their shoving game, oshikura manju. The aim of the game was to push each other with their backs until they stepped out of the circle. Rin had tried it once, and even though it was fun, the boys were a bit older and much stronger than her and she usually ended up with sore feet, stubbed toes and grazes on her hands when she fell.

The two other girls from the village, Yui and Ichika, were kneeling near the wall of their home, setting up a small game of ohajiki, a much more peaceful and placid game. She elected to ask the girls if she could join them

‘Hi Rin!’

‘Do you wanna play with us? We’re playing ohajiki.’

Both the girls greeted her brightly as she approached. The children of the Lady Kaede’s village were so different to the ones she had known from her own village. They were warm and inviting and friendly, not at all like the older girls who once upon a time would only let her play with them if she pretended to be a servant while they pranced about acting like noble ladies.

‘Sure.’ She dropped to her knees beside them and they shuffled further apart to make room for her. They had collected a small pile of stones for the game, gathered in front of them, some of the little pebbles almost perfectly round and smooth. ‘Oh!’ Rin said, remembering her latest gift from Shippo. ‘We could use these too.’ She reached into her kosode and pulled out three round, coloured glass beads and held them out to show the girls.

‘Wow!’

‘So pretty!’

‘Are you sure?’

‘Of course,’ Rin said. ‘As long as I get them back at the end of the game. They were a gift from Shippo.’

‘Okay.’

‘No problem!’

A quick round of janken was the decider for who would go first, Yui being the victor. She scattered the rocks and marbles in the circle marked in the dirt and took her first turn, drawing a short line between the two rocks closest to each other and flicking one at the other to strike it.

‘That was too easy,’ Ichika taunted. ‘Try a harder one!’

Yui, having successfully collected the stone she struck, looked at the stones again for another turn. ‘Okay,’ she said, before drawing a line between two stones a little further apart. She took aim again, her tongue poking out of the side of her lips, and flicked. Her aim was a little off though, and she missed. ‘Darn it!’

Ichika took a turn next, drawing a short line between a marble and a rock sitting close to each other.

‘That’s too easy!’ Yui taunted back at her, but Ichika paid no mind, only poking her tongue out at her friend. She took aim and flicked, successfully hitting the stone with the marble.

‘Yes!’ she exclaimed and collected the rock she had struck. Having won, she took another turn.

Rin watched the game carefully. Ichika won two more turns before she made a bad choice and flicked a rock at the wrong angle, causing it to miss her target. That meant it was Rin’s turn.

She could’ve chosen to target the two rocks that were closest to each other on the far side of the circle, but she wasn’t sure if she could get the right angle to make it a sure win. Instead, right in front of her was a stone perfectly aligned with one of the marbles on the far side of the circle. It was further away, but would be an easy win. ‘This one,’ Rin said, drawing a line from the stone to the marble. She carefully took aim, bending forward to get the perfect shot, and flicked. The stone made contact with the marble. ‘Yes!’

‘Wow!’

‘That was great!’

Ichika and Yui both applauded with their praise. Rin couldn’t help her smile as she collected up her marble as her victory token.

The friendly game carried on, and even though Ichika won the most stones, Rin didn’t feel bad about losing. They just played again, and again, and again, until the sun dipped under the horizon and the girls’ mother called out for supper.

* * *

Rin made her way back to Kaede’s house before the evening could settle in. On her way home though she had to stop at her melon patch, to check how they were growing. The melon seeds were the first thing she planted after being asked to stay in Lady Kaede’s village, and she was hoping that at least one of the melons would be ready before Lord Sesshomaru visited again. The vine had been in flower for a few days now, but it wasn’t bearing any fruit.

She carefully tiptoed through the vines, crouching down to check on each flower. No fruit. No fruit. No fruit. It wasn’t a big vine, and perhaps it wouldn’t bear fruit this year at all. Rin was somewhat accustomed to the disappointment in her daily check.

Lo and behold though, hiding underneath a cluster of leaves was a flower she hadn’t spotted before, attached to a round lump that could only be the beginning of a melon. ‘Yes!’ she exclaimed aloud. She crouched by the little flower and lifted it up to the receding light. It was still young and fuzzy, but it was undoubtedly fruit.

_Thank you, little melon._

She gave a quick prayer for the melon, hoping it would grow fast, strong, and big, before standing up, dusting herself off and skipping back to Lady Kaede’s house for supper.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did a lot more research on this chapter than I normally do, and it may not all be 100% accurate, but there isn’t a great deal of info about the Sengoku period online, it mostly seems to be about the Edo period. Same applies to TJM, everything seems to be about TCM, which apparently is where TJM was derived from anyway. 
> 
> Here are some of the references I used for the plants/herbs and games. 
> 
> https://holisticprimarycare.net/topics/acupuncture-a-oriental-med/six-chinese-herbs-every-doctor-should-know/  
> https://www.japantimes.co.jp/life/2001/08/16/environment/yama-torikabuto-japanese-monkshood/  
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Astragalus  
> https://www.nies.go.jp/biodiversity/invasive/DB/detail/80930e.html  
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oshikura_Manju  
> https://web-japan.org/nipponia/nipponia26/en/topic/index.html


	6. Cheer Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inuyasha has changed since Kagome disappeared, but Rin just wants to see him happy again.

The little Rin skipped through the young forest, humming her favourite tune. The trees had sprouted fast after the destruction left from Naraku, and there was plenty of shrubbery and food to be found on the ground. She hopped from plant to plant, picking berries and mushrooms and the occasional daikon or nagaimo.

She wasn’t alone in the forest though. She froze up when she heard something else moving around behind her, but when she turned she saw the familiar red kimono and knew it was nothing to be afraid of.

_I wonder where he’s off to?_

Inuyasha hadn’t noticed Rin; she was hidden behind the line of trees and shrubs while he walked down the path. She stopped and wondered for a moment if she should follow him or carry on hunting for more vegetables for supper, but curiosity quickly got the best of her. As quietly as she could, she followed him.

He wasn’t heading far from the village. He came to the clearing of the Bone Eater’s Well and stopped. Silently, he stood in front of the well, while Rin watched from just behind the trees. She couldn’t see his face, but his head was bowed, staring down the well. Was he looking for Kagome?

‘Kagome…’ His voice was soft and distant in the quiet clearing, not his usual abrasive shout. ‘I just want to see you again. I want to know that you’re happy.’ He sunk to his knees by the side of the well, laying his arms on the edge and resting his chin on his arms. ‘You’re where you belong,’ he murmured. ‘I just want to see you one more time.’

Rin knew she shouldn’t have been eavesdropping on him. He was obviously missing Kagome, even after all the time that had passed since she had been taken away. It was a pain she was all too familiar with, and it even made her feel a little guilty knowing that her dear Lord Sesshomaru was at least able to visit her, while Kagome was gone forever. It wasn’t fair. He looked so sad, and she wanted to do something to help.

She stepped out of the forest line, Inuyasha instantly perking up. ‘Huh?’ he asked, his voice back to normal. He turned his head to look at her. ‘What are you doing here?’

Rin ignored his defensiveness and crossed over to sit beside him, her back to the well and knees hugged to her chest. Once she was settled, clearly not going anywhere until she was sure he felt at least a little better, she asked, ‘are you sad, Inuyasha?’

‘Ng,’ he groaned. ‘Why would you think that?’ his voice had softened a little again.

‘I heard what you said,’ she confessed. ‘You miss Kagome, don’t you?’

Inuyasha’s eyes dropped away as he turned his head. He didn’t give an answer, but he didn’t have to. Kagome’s disappearance had changed him in ways no one had expected. Even Rin could see the differences in him. Most of the time he was quieter, more obliging, some even dared to call him obedient. He lashed out at times, but not nearly as much as he used to. The hole she had left in his heart had caused him a great deal of pain and suffering.

‘I miss her too,’ Rin admitted. She thought back fondly on the memories she had of Kagome. Even though it was usually when Lord Sesshomaru and Inuyasha were fighting, Kagome was always quick to ensure Rin was safe and out of harm’s way. ‘She was always so kind,’ she murmured, ‘and brave.’

‘Yeah,’ Inuyasha agreed, his voice heavy. He turned around to sit beside Rin, legs crossed and arms folded into his kimono, settling in to their conversation. It took him a moment before he spoke again. ‘She fought the jewel for so long, and she was all alone in there.’ Rin glanced at him as he spoke and saw that he was looking up. He was gazing at the space where the meido had appeared that day and stolen Kagome away. ‘I just keep thinking about her voice, calling out to me.’ He closed his eyes for a moment, his brow furrowing in pain before his head dropped and he stare down at the ground. ‘She was so happy to see her family again. Her mom was crying.’

‘Oh,’ Rin murmured, ‘I didn’t know she had a family.’ For some unknown reason, Rin had always assumed that Kagome was an orphan, like her. No one really talked about Kagome anymore either, so she had never had an opportunity to ask.

‘Oh yeah. I suppose you wouldn’t know. Kagome came from the other side of the well, a whole different world,’ he explained. That much Rin had already figured out from the drips of information people left for her. ‘She has her mother, grandfather, and brother there. That where she…’ he hesitated before finishing his sentence, ‘she’s supposed to be.’

That, Rin knew, was very mature of Inuyasha. She’d heard Lady Kaede mention it once before, Inuyasha’s selfish desires to have Kagome and Lady Kikyo had only caused all three of them much pain. But his acknowledgement that Kagome had things of her own that she wanted, other than to be with him, and acceptance that he was not the centre of her life proved to Lady Kaede how much he had grown. But ‘growth’ wouldn’t comfort Inuyasha now, and she really just wanted to help him feel happy again. ‘I think she wanted to be here with you too,’ she said, smiling gently up at him. ‘She always smiled when she was with you.’

‘Keh,’ Inuyasha laughed a short dark sarcastic noise as one corner of his mouth curled up. ‘You never saw her when she was mad.’

Rin’s eyes widened in surprise. ‘Kagome got mad?!’

‘What?’ he scoffed. ‘All the time! She would beat me, grab my ears. Don’t even start me on the _sit_ thing.’ He huffed and sat back against the side of the well, eyes closed and nose in the air. ‘She was scarier than Sesshomaru when she got mad.’

Rin giggled at him. He seemed to be back to his normal self; funny, kind of angry and a little bit rude in his own selfish way. ‘Lord Sesshomaru isn’t that scary,’ she teased.

‘Maybe to you,’ Inuyasha retorted. ‘I’ll bet you’ve never been at the wrong end of his sword.’

She giggled again. ‘Well of course not, silly.’ Even in her wildest dreams, she couldn’t imagine Lord Sesshoumaru attacking her.

‘I never understood why he took you with him.’

Rin looked up at him again, perplexed. It wasn’t the first time people had gotten confused or intrigued by the fact that she, a little human girl, trailed after the great Lord Sesshomaru. But why? It wasn’t that abnormal for humans and demons to live or travel together, Inuyasha and his friends were a prime example of that. ‘What do you mean?’

‘Why did Sesshomaru take you with him?’ he asked. ‘And why did he leave you behind?’

Left _behind_. Most people who asked about it always told her that she was _left behind_. It never grew any easier for her to hear. ‘He’s my friend,’ she said, pulling her knees in closer to her chest. ‘He saved me.’

‘Saved you?’ Inuyasha repeated, the shock plain in his voice. ‘Sesshomaru doesn’t save people. Especially not humans.’

‘Well, he did,’ she said. It was a fact, and no one’s assumptions about her Lord Sesshomaru would ever change the fact that he had saved her from death, twice even. She explained for Inuyasha, ‘I died once. And then Lord Sesshomaru brought me back to life. Master Jaken said he used the Tenseiga. Since then, I have always followed Lord Sesshoumaru. Until Lady Kaede asked me to stay here.’

Inuyasha was quiet for a moment, staring at her. Eventually he flicked his head back, his nose in the air again and stated, ‘that’s not the Sesshomaru I know.’

Rin was well aware that things had never been easy or amicable between Lord Sesshomaru and Inuyasha. Master Jaken had explained it a couple of times, but his reasons always changed. Inuyasha was a half-demon; Inuyasha wielded the Tetsusaiga; Inuyasha was the reason for the great Lord Toga’s death; Inuyasha was the reason Lord Sesshomaru was used to master the Meido Zangetsuha. Lord Sesshomaru had many reasons to not like Inuyasha, but that didn’t make him a bad person. ‘He’s not mean,’ Rin argued, ‘once you get to know him.’

‘Keh.’ Inuyasha scoffed again, but then his tone softened as he added, ‘you’re probably the first person who’s ever gotten to know him.’

‘Really?’ Rin asked. Her whole core warmed through. She knew Lord Sesshomaru had lived a long life, and had always assumed there had been others before her, but maybe not. ‘I didn’t think I was special like that.’

Inuyasha laughed. The sound warmed her even further, glad that she had managed her goal of cheering him up, in some small way. ‘Kid,’ he teased, ‘you’re the most special person I’ve ever seen with Sesshomaru.’

Rin smiled to herself, a little giggle escaping her. ‘You’re funny Inuyasha,’ she teased back at him.

‘What?’ he asked. ‘What did I say?’

She shook her head at him with a grin, then explained, ‘I came here to cheer you up, but instead, you cheered me up.’

Inuyasha grinned back at her as he plopped a hand on her head and softly ruffled her hair. ‘You did alright kid,’ he said. ‘Thanks.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you thank you thank you to everyone’s lovely comments so far, I honestly sit here reading all your wonderful kind words pretty much whenever I am not writing, it is so motivating. Thank you for all the kudos too, it is wonderful to know that you are reading and appreciate my story.   
> I hope you liked this chapter, Inuyasha is turning into such a soft boi around Rin. I honestly do believe he matured a lot while Kagome was in high school. He is a tough one to write sometimes though.


	7. Calligraphy and Cantaloupe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lord Sesshomaru returns to visit Rin, and comes to learn why she needs to stay in the village.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t know anything about Japanese calligraphy, and much of what I have learnt while writing this chapter has come from Wikipedia sources. If there’s anything that’s incorrect, or just not quite right, please do let me know!!

The afternoon sun was warm, the spring wind was soothing, and the birds were singing a dulcet song in the trees above them. The perfect afternoon weather was the main reason Lady Kaede and Rin had taken their writing lesson outside that day, to the top of the grassy hill just out of the village. Inuyasha had joined them with his transformed Tetsusaiga and a sharpening stone loaned from Totosai, and Shippo tagged a long as well, practising a new transformation technique he had picked up from his fox-demon friends with periodic popping noises and puffs of white smoke. 

Rin worked at the small desk set out on the grass in front of her, Lady Kaede watching from her right. The desk was just large enough to hold a sheet of washi, the shallow box of ink-soaked cotton, and a stone rest for the brush. There were drawers underneath the desk that served as storage for the instruments and the extra clean washi sheets. Kaede had given her a simple phrase to practice, and she copied it across the washi as smoothly and delicately as she could, while listening to the melodic birds, rhythmic popping of Shippo’s transformation and grinding of Inuyasha’s stone on his sword. 

Inuyasha stopped. 

He stuck his nose in the air, looking around as he sniffed. He growled and huffed, more annoyed than afraid of what he smelled. ‘Great,’ he muttered. ‘He’s coming.’

‘Who?’ asked Shippo, before he gave another pop and transformed back to his normal fox demon form. 

‘Sesshomaru.’

Rin looked up from her paper. Shippo glanced at her and gave her a bright smile, while Inuyasha, uninterested, returned to sharpening his Tetsusaiga. It had been weeks, months even, since his last visit, and Rin couldn’t hide her happiness. She wanted nothing more than to forget her lesson and run out to find him, to throw herself into his arms and hear his gentle voice once more. 

Lady Kaede tapped the side of the desk with her finger. ‘Finish here first, child,’ she said firmly. ‘No doubt he’s still a ways away.’

Her excitement dulled a little. Lady Kaede was a stern teacher, despite her kind-hearted nature. ‘Yes, Lady Kaede,’ Rin said, and resumed practising her writing. While she enjoyed learning how to write, she was sometimes a little jealous that the other children didn’t have to do it. In that moment, she would’ve much preferred to be like every other child and not have the responsibility of calligraphy lessons. 

Nonetheless, she finished the phrase she was practising, and copied it out three more time across the page before running out of room. She laid the brush down on it’s rest, indicating she was finished. 

‘Very good,’ Lady Kaede said with a pleased smile. ‘Now you may greet your lord.’

‘Huh?’ Rin looked up and around. She saw no sign of Lord Sesshomaru yet, but Lady Kaede wore an exultant smile. He was nearby. 

‘Your nose has dulled, Inuyasha.’

The familiar deep and cool voice came from behind her. Rin spun as fast as she could, her head nearly twisting off her neck, to see her ethereal lord standing tall above her. ‘Lord Sesshomaru!’ she delightedly squealed. 

‘What d’you say Sesshomaru?!’ Inuyasha barked, putting his sharpening stone down and taking hold of the handle of his Tetsusaiga, one foot moving to stand flat on the ground in case he needed to jump into action. 

Lord Sesshomaru ignored him though, instead looking down to greet the little girl kneeling patiently at his feet. ‘Rin. Have you been well?’

‘Mm-hm!’ Rin proclaimed with an enthusiastic nod. ‘And you, my Lord?’

‘Yes.’ The one word was all he gave, but the familiar softness in his voice told her more than his words ever would. He was well. He was safe. He was happy. But he was also alone. 

Rin climbed to her feet, dusting the grass from her knees. ‘I’m so glad to see you again,’ she chirped. ‘But, where is Master Jaken?’

‘He is following.’

That was all he said, and that was enough. 

Inuyasha said something to Shippo that Rin didn’t pay much mind to, something about supper with Miroku and Sango, and the pair quickly headed off down the grassy hill. Lord Sesshomaru watched Inuyasha walk by with wary eyes, and Inuyasha returned the incredulous glare until he passed and Lord Sesshomaru returned his attention to the little girl before him. 

‘What are you writing?’

‘Oh.’ Rin glanced over her shoulder at the writing desk on the ground beside Lady Kaede. ‘This is sosho,’ she explained, although Lord Sesshomaru probably already knew that, he was so very smart. ‘Lady Kaede has been teaching me.’

‘Indeed.’ 

His tone was cool and dry, and possibly even slightly displeased: a subtlety that Lady Kaede did not miss. However, she didn’t take offence, merely chuckling to herself, and asked, ‘perhaps it is not to Lord Sesshomaru’s expectation?’ 

Lord Sesshomaru blinked once and answered plainly, ‘it is the lady’s hand.’ 

Rin was confused. ‘Is that bad?’ she asked, looking between Lady Kaede and Lord Sesshomaru.

‘Nay, child,’ Lady Kaede answered with a slow shake of her head, ‘that is not his meaning. Lords and ladies have different hands. Ye has been learning sosho, the ladies’ hand. Lord Sesshomaru would be more familiar with kaisho, the gentleman’s hand.’

Lord Sesshomaru gave a small curt nod. ‘Correct.’

‘Oh.’ Rin was relieved that Lord Sesshomaru wasn’t disappointed or displeased with what she had been learning, but now she was curious as to why she learnt something different to what he did. She wanted to know what he knew, and be able to do everything just like he did. 

Lord Sesshomaru lowered to the ground, kneeling beside Rin and her little desk. He was now even height with her. Rin knew that she had grown, her orange and yellow yukata now rather short, but seeing her Lord eye to eye reminded her that she was growing up quickly in his absence. He hadn’t changed at all though. Would he ever grow old?

He glanced at the desk, then back to her eyes as he said, ‘show me what you have learnt.’

‘Oh!’ Rin blinked away her momentary adulation and turned around to kneel at the desk again. ‘Um, hold on,’ she murmured. She moved away the washi she had already covered with her practise, and took a clean sheet from the drawer. She took up the brush again and dipped it in the ink-soaked cotton and then moved her hand across to the paper to write.

But write what? 

She hesitated, her brush hovering just above the paper. Nothing was coming to her. She couldn’t remember a single stroke. And especially not anything that might make Lord Sesshomaru proud. She only knew very basic things, and didn’t even know how to put most of the words into sentences. Her hand dropped, drawing the brush away from the page, and she murmured, ‘I don’t know what to write.’

‘What have you learnt?’ Lord Sesshomaru prompted. 

She had a quick think. The first thing she learnt was her name, and then the names of other people and things. ‘I can write my name,’ she answered. ‘I know how to write some of the herbs and vegetables Lady Kaede has been teaching me about.’

‘Then write that.’ 

His voice had a gentle touch and filled her with confidence. She raised the brush again, and started writing some of the foods and herbs she had learned about. Gohan. Daikon. Shiso. Negi. Ume. Nagaimo. She kept her strokes small and delicate, just as lady Kaede had taught her while her lord watched her surreptitiously, but after a few words, her mind started to go blank. She couldn’t remember any more. 

‘Where is ‘Rin’?’ Lord Sesshomaru asked, examining her words. 

‘Oh!’ She had completely forgotten to write her own name. She dipped the brush again and quickly stroked out the few little lines that made her name. ‘I think that’s right.’

‘Good.’

She glanced over at Lord Sesshomaru and saw a little smile tilting the corners of his mouth upward and bringing a warmth like the sun to his golden eyes. She couldn’t help her grin, even a little giggle, incredibly happy that she had done something correctly for her Lord. 

‘Would you like to learn the full form?’

‘Huh?’ Her brow furrowed with confusion. ‘Oh,’ she realised, remember what Lady Kaede had said just moments ago. ‘You mean kaisho?’

‘Yes.’

‘Yes please!’ Rin enthusiastically begged and grinned, keen to learn anything she could from her Lord Sesshomaru. He held out his hand and Rin passed him the brush. 

He held the brush delicately, between his two forefingers and thumb. The bristles barely touched the paper and his hand hardly moved, but Rin watched as several small strokes appeared under his touch to form a neat and detailed character. It was much more complex than the way she had been taught, but she could see the subtle similarities. She much preferred the way Lord Sesshomaru wrote it. 

‘Now you,’ he said, holding the brush out for her. 

‘Oh. Um okay.’ She had been so entranced by the beautiful way he painted her name, she had not paid any attention to how to write it. 

Rin took the brush back, and tried to copy how he wrote, the way he held the brush, the smallest of movements in her wrist and lightest of touches on the paper. There were a lot more strokes to his kaisho though, and even though she could copy his character right beside hers, she couldn’t remember exactly how it was supposed to go. Her hand trembled and she knew she made at least one mistake. ‘That’s not right, is it?’

‘Not quite.’ 

She pursed her lips, looking between Lord Sesshomaru’s beautiful delicate character, and her blotchy, misshapen one. Something was very wrong. 

‘Start here,’ Lord Sesshomaru said as he pointed with the tip of his claw at the first stroke on his character. Rin adjusted her grip on the brush to the way she was more accustomed to, and started again with the stroke he indicated. He pointed with his claw, but kept his eyes trained on what she was writing, while Rin glanced back and forth between his character and her second attempt. With his guidance, she finished the character, less deformed and much neater than her first version. ‘Much better.’

‘Thank you!’ She beamed up at him, her heart swelling with pride. Learning to write her name was an achievement, but learning Lord Sesshomaru’s way of writing her name made her feel utterly special. 

Her next question was one she had been asking Lady Kaede for weeks. The only thing she really wanted to learn was how to write Lord Sesshomaru’s name, but Lady Kaede insisted that she would learn it in time. If the priestess wouldn’t teach her though, she could always ask the lord himself, so she plucked up a little courage, and asked, ‘could you teach me how to write your name, Lord Sesshomaru?’

He blinked once, contemplating, then gave the smallest of smiles, one that hardly moved his lips but still brought a softness to his eyes, and held out his hand. Rin passed him the brush once more, bursting with excitement. This time, she paid close attention to the order or strokes, watching keenly and learning as he drew out the three characters that made his name. There were an awful lot of strokes to it, far more complicated than anything she had attempted before. She gulped, staring at the intricate lines and tiny shapes that made his name. ‘That looks hard.’

Lord Sesshomaru held the brush toward her. She hesitated, but quickly swallowed down her fears and put on a brave face. She had asked after all, so what was the point if she didn’t at least try. She took the brush, re-inked it and poised it. Lord Sesshomaru’s sharp claw pointed to the first stroke, and Rin copied, not quite as neatly, and not quite as small and delicate as his stroke, but otherwise much the same. He guided her, tracing his characters with his claw tip to show her where to paint next. The first character was by far the most complicated, and Rin’s confidence grew as she moved on to the last two and her strokes became smoother and neater. She finished the characters and looked between his beautiful calligraphy and her slightly uneven and shaky shapes. It wasn’t perfect, but it was definitely close. She brightly grinned up at Lord Sesshomaru to see him looking at her writing as well, before turning his gaze to her and giving a little smile and gentle nod. His smiles were a rare treasure she cherished with every fibre of her being, especially knowing that he was smiling because of something she did.

‘Oh Lord Sesshomaru!’ Jaken’s shrill cry called out from the bottom of the hill. 

‘Master Jaken!’ Rin turned and called excitedly, waving at him as he started trudging up, Ah-Un in tow. He stopped a moment to wave and back at her. 

‘Perhaps it be time to head home,’ Lady Kaede suggested. 

The sun was nearing the horizon. There’d be at least on hour of light left, but Rin was happy to finish her writing lesson a little early to spend more time with Lord Sesshomaru. ‘Okay,’ she chirped and began packing away her writing desk. Lady Kaede took hold of her bow and used it to help push herself to her feet. ‘Wait, Lady Kaede, let me help you,’ Rin said, jumping to her feet and taking hold of the old lady’s arms to help her stand. Once Lady Kaede was on her feet and as Lord Sesshomaru swiftly raised up to standing, Rin stashed away the rest of the writing tools, leaving only her washi sheet with Lord Sesshomaru’s kaisho calligraphy on top. Master Jaken came to the top of the hill, huffing and puffing from the climb. Rin went to give him a hug, but the first thing she noticed was the round lump on his head. 

‘Master Jaken, what happened?’ she cried. 

‘Inuyasha happened, that’s what,’ Master Jaken grumbled. ‘That rude little—’

‘Oh Master Jaken,’ Rin giggled. She picked up her writing desk as she asked, ‘Were you picking fights again?’ 

‘What?!’ Master Jaken squawked. ‘Why would you blame me?’

Lady Kaede lifted the writing desk from Rin’s arms. ‘I shall be heading back home, Rin,’ she informed the little girl. ‘Perhaps ye would like to take Lord Sesshomaru to the fruit trees, if we could be so honoured by the Lord’s presence for supper?’

Rin spun around to face Lord Sesshomaru on her other side, a bright twinkling smile lighting up her face. ‘Would you join us for supper, Lord Sesshomaru?’

He gazed upon her sweet joy for a second before giving a small nod and a short ‘hm’. 

‘Thank you!’ Rin shouted, pouncing on him to wrap her arms around his thighs and press her cheek against the sash on his waist. She drew back quickly, remembering that Lord Sesshomaru didn’t usually care for her hugs and instead slipped her hand into his, taking Lady Kaede’s suggestion. ‘Com’on,’ she said, leading him down the hill ‘I’ll show you the melons I’ve been growing too!’

* * *

Rin led Lord Sesshomaru and Master Jaken to the fruit trees, babbling about her daily life as they strolled; about the fruit that she had been growing in the orchard and it’s seasonal availability; about the flowers she had seen in and about the village, particularly some beautiful orange and white ones, and the plant with a ball shape of purple petals that looked like butterflies; about the mouse that invaded Lady Kaede’s home the other day and how Inuyasha managed to capture it and had it for his supper; about Sango and her ever growing belly and the speculation that she may in fact be carrying twins. Master Jaken, leading the faithful Ah-Un, answered her questions, and responded to her comments as necessary, while Sesshomaru followed behind a few steps watching the boundless girl skip and dance ahead of him. 

The orchard was a sight to behold, the momo and ume trees in full flower. She twirled and sung in the circle of trees under the dappled afternoon light. Wind rustled through the branches and shook a few loose flowers down, Rin giggling as she spun in circles with arms wide under the petals floating around her until she fell to the ground.

There wasn’t a lot of fruit available on the trees, summer still a month or more away, but there were some ringo on one tree that had survived the winter, and Rin knew at least one of her melons was ready and ripe. 

Under Lord Sesshomaru’ instruction, Master Jaken helped Rin to collect a few ringo from the lower branches of the tree. The ones that Rin wanted from higher branches Lord Sesshomaru collected for her himself, gently plucking them from the tree. She filled the skirt of her kosode with the ringo they pulled from the tree, but she wasn’t able to walk with her skirt so full, so again at Lord Sesshomaru’s behest, Master Jaken helped Rin, bundling the fruit in his small arms. 

As the sun dipped below the horizon and the sky grew dark Rin took her friends to the melon patch on the way back to Lady Kaede’s house. The melon that had first bloomed in her little patch was ripe for the picking. She pulled it from the vine, and while Lord Sesshomaru told her to give it to Master Jaken to carry, she insisted she could take it herself. She explained to Lord Sesshomaru as they headed back to Lady Kaede’s home that she had been praying on that very melon every day for it to be ripe and ready when he returned again. 

Back in the little hut, Lady Kaede was nearly finished preparing a small meal for Rin, Master Jaken and herself. Rin busied herself in wrapping up most of the ringo into a sturdy bundle, and even added some mushrooms and umeboshi for Master Jaken. All the while Rin questioned Master Jaken on what he and Lord Sesshomaru had been doing since she last saw them. It was mostly slaying demons, fighting monsters and disposing of wicked bandits that were trying to move in on the Western Lands. Only at one point during his tale did Lord Sesshomaru scorn Master Jaken, to which the little imp demon quickly asserted, ‘oh yes, I’ll come back to that later.’ 

Lady Kaede served out their supper while Rin quickly scrubbed her hands in the wash bucket and then used their knife to slice up the melon, revealing the sweet orange flesh. Lady Kaede offered her assistance, but Rin insisted that she could do it herself, carving off the skin and seeds and slicing the melon into small pieces. Much like her calligraphy, it was a little haphazard and the pieces somewhat misshapen, but she presented her Lord Sesshomaru with the bowl of sweet melon pieces that she had grown and prepared herself. She didn’t think she could be any happier with what she had served until she saw the smile he gave her, the first real smile she had seen from him since before she had been living with Lady Kaede. It wasn’t a big grin such as Inuyasha’s, or even held the sweetness of Sango or Kagome’s. It was only a momentary upturn of the corners of his lips, but it created a warmth that reached his eyes and caused them to narrow just a touch as he thanked her. A warm joy filled her being, but along with it came the tiny prick of something sharp in her chest and the corners of her eyes. The little girl had not realised just how much she missed caring for her Lord Sesshomaru, a bittersweet nostalgia settling in.

Master Jaken continued with his tales over the course of the meal, however, several times he diverged from his story to ramble about meaningless side notes, usually about himself, such as the time he fought off a fearsome snake, or the time he found himself sleep walking all alone, or the time that he came across an onsen after being separated from Lord Sesshoumaru in battle. The first couple of times it happened Rin let him ramble his little story, but after that she pulled him back on track, interrupting his story by asking, ‘yes, but Master Jaken, what about Lord Sesshomaru?’ Every time, Master Jaken would inevitably answer with, ‘oh yes, I forgot,’ before carrying on with Lord Sesshomaru’s story. 

By the time supper was finished Master Jaken’s tale was coming to the point where Lord Sesshomaru was making his way back to the village. Rin questioned Master Jaken about the bit that he skipped earlier, the one that he was meant to come back to later, but he only turned to Lord Sesshomaru, to await permission. With a nod to the door, Lord Sesshoumaru instructed his vassal to go get  _it_ . Master Jaken bowed with a quick, ‘at once, m’lord,’ and scurried off. 

The room fell quiet. Rin collected the bowls, Lady Kaede advising she could clean them in the morning after Lord Sesshomaru had left. She couldn’t help the disappointed ‘oh,’ that escaped her. It had been nearly a year now, and she hadn’t changed her mind on wanting to be with Lord Sesshomaru, but evidently the grown-ups had other intentions. She wasn’t fully prepared for the reality of being told to stay behind again, a sharp pain sinking in to her chest, but she decidedly shook it off, reminding herself of the kind smile she had received from her Lord Sesshomaru in exchange for his supper. Nothing was going to ruin her evening with her favourite companions.

Master Jaken came rushing back to the room, bearing a square of folded cloth with a beautiful white and purple stripe pattern decorated with golden butterflies. She watched as Master Jaken marched into the room and expected him to bear the cloth to Lord Sesshomaru, but instead he walked straight for Rin. 

‘Huh?’ she asked, staring at the cloth. It was a folded yukata. ‘Is this…’ she stammered out, ‘for me?’ 

She looked from the yukata in Master Jaken’s arms, up to her Lord Sesshomaru. Another gift was the last thing she expected, let alone a princess’ yukata. It was exquisite. 

‘Well go on!’ Master Jaken squawked, pushing the gift toward her. ‘Don’t just stare! Take it!’

Rin lifted the soft cloth from Master Jaken’s arms. Fitted inside the yukata was a white juban, the little collar visible under the perfectly folded cloth. She jumped to her feet, almost knocking Master Jaken over in the process, and let the gift unfold as she held it up in front of her to see it in all its glory. It was complete with a new obi sash tied at the waist in a rich red. ‘It’s beautiful!’ She exclaimed. She turned it over to hold the new yukata against her body. It was long, but would no doubt fit for a couple years yet. ‘Lord Sesshomaru, it’s amazing! The colour is so pretty! And I love the butterflies!’

‘Ahem, well,’ Master Jaken coughed, clearing his throat. ‘Not quite an appropriate colour for a village girl—’

He barely opened his mouth before receiving a cool glare from Lord Sesshomaru, one that was not missed by Rin. Master Jaken quickly corrected, ‘ah but it is the colour Lord Sesshomaru deemed suitable for you Rin.’ 

Rin giggled at the silly little imp once again putting his foot in his mouth, before returning her attention to the beautiful gift she held to her shoulders. ‘I love it!’ She gushed. She scooped the cloth over her arm before dashing across the room to throw her little self into her Lord’s lap, her arms flying around his neck. ‘Thank you Lord Sesshomaru!’ 

He didn’t respond, but simply placed one hand on her back over her dark tresses. 

Rin jumped off him as quickly as she had pounced onto him, standing up straight to admire her new gift again. She turned it around to show Lady Kaede as well, holding it up to her body again. ‘Isn’t it so pretty?’

Lady Kaede smiled and gave a gentle nod. ‘Well timed too,’ she mentioned. ‘I was only thinking the other day you would need a new kosode or yukata.’

It was true that she had more than outgrown her orange kosode, but it had been her very first gift from Lord Sesshomaru, so she could never part with it. But now that she had a new yukata, perhaps it was time to upgrade. ‘Can I try it on now?’ she asked excitedly. 

Lady Kaede smiled for her again, happy to oblige the excited little girl. ‘Aye,’ she said, ‘but perhaps—’

Before she could finish Lord Sesshomaru was already on his feet, moving for the door. On his way he picked up the slow and ignorant imp demon by the scruff of his kariginu and tossed him outside before stepping out himself, to give the little girl some privacy. 

Lady Kaede smiled at Rin once more. ‘Me thinks yes,’ she said, ‘you may change now Rin.’ 

The priestess helped her to change, also bringing the wash bucket of cold water closer to scrub off some of the dirt and ink from the child’s face, arms, legs and feet. It would be no good to put a dirty body into such lovely clean clothes. Lady Kaede helped her into the juban, showing her how to securely tie it, then helped her slip into the the beautiful new yukata. It was long, but not too long that she couldn’t use her hands or let it trail on the ground. It would serve her for a few years, and a few small growth spurts yet. Lady Kaede tied the obi for her, forming a neat bow at her back. If she only could manage to run a comb through the little girl’s hair, she could almost pass for a princess. Nonetheless, she looked beautiful. 

‘Ye may return now,’ she called to the men waiting outside. 

Lord Sesshomaru came back inside, Master Jaken trailing behind. Rin was busy examining herself, at least the arms and lower parts of the yukata she could see, but when she noticed Lord Sesshomaru re-enter the room, she grinned. She twirled on the spot, spinning on the ball of one foot, showing him all angles of her new outfit. ‘What do you think?’ 

‘Ahem,’ Master Jaken coughed again, before voicing his opinion; ‘I still don’t think the colour suits you Rin. You would be much better suited to something in pink or yellow.’ 

He hardly got his words out before he was kicked hard in the side, sending him flying across the room and into the wall. He groaned as he sunk down to the floor, whimpering something about how his opinion didn’t matter. 

Rin beamed up at her Lord, her cheeks bursting from the strain of her smile. He had chosen the yukata specifically for the colour, so that everyone in the human village would know that this girl was special, she was someone very important, and to ensure she would be treated with the utmost respect. The colour suited her, and the vibrant butterflies made it look as though she was perpetually dancing in a field of the fluttering creatures. He nodded, pleased with his decision, before sitting down again. 

While the colour didn’t seem to mean too much to Rin, if only to make her feel like a princess, the meaning was not lost on Lady Kaede. She smiled graciously at the demon lord, and thanked him, ‘it is splendid indeed. Thank ye, Lord Sesshomaru.’

* * *

Lady Kaede left the trio alone for a while, excusing Rin from joining her in her evening prayer routine to let her spend more time with her friends. She chattered away with Master Jaken like it was old times, telling him about a new song she had made up with her friends about him while playing janken, and showed Lord Sesshomaru the pretty golden butterfly trinket she had found in the field while sewing seeds one day. Master Jaken nattered away about the great feats Lord Sesshomaru had accomplished, much to Rin’s delight, and how much less stressful his life was without having to constantly worry about her. Lord Sesshomaru sat and listened to them both, watching the fire, not a word spoken, only occasionally throwing a glance at either of his little companions. 

Rin’s chattering grew less as Master Jaken started droning on. The fire was dying down, the flames turned to smouldering coals, and Rin’s eyes started drooping. Her head bowed once, twice, before she jerked herself awake again. Master Jaken didn’t notice, too enraptured by his own story to pay attention to his audience, but Lord Sesshomaru spotted her signs of tiredness. 

‘Are you getting tired, Rin?’

‘Mm,’ she murmured. Rin raised her fists to her eyes and rubbed, trying to force the sleep from her eyes. ‘I’m okay,’ she mumbled. ‘I don’t want to sleep yet.’

‘Come here.’ 

Lord Sesshoumaru extended his right hand to her. As much as she didn’t want to go to sleep, at least she could resume her little ritual, to cuddle up against his soft mokomoko until she drifted off to sleep and he left. She started to crawl towards him, but pushed herself up to her feet when she realised she didn’t want to damage her new yukata. She took her place next to him, resting under his arm, her head against the soft fur over his shoulder. He laid his hand on her leg, the first time he had placed his hand on her while letting her cuddle with him like this, a warmth radiating from his palm like a blanket on her thigh. 

‘Jaken.’ Lord Sesshomaru’s voice broke the soft silence. 

Master Jaken had fallen quiet, but he raised his head with an undignified squark of ‘yes, m’lord?’

‘Take Ah-Un to the river.’ 

‘At once, m’lord.’ 

Rin opened one eye a crack to watch Master Jaken trudge from the house. Before he could escape, Lord Sesshomaru added, ‘take the bowls with you.’

Master Jaken blinked at the stack of bowls beside the door. He repeated, this time with a heavy sigh and much less enthusiasm, ‘yes, m’lord,’ and picked up the teetering stack almost as tall as him before carrying it out. Rin didn’t even hear the end of Ah-Un’s heavy footfalls trudging into the distance before sleep overcame her. 

The priestess was the first to return. She didn’t pay any mind to the demon lord or little girl resting under his shoulder, nor did he pay any mind to her. She spread out an old futon on the far side of the room and laid down to sleep. 

Jaken returned once the old lady was fast asleep. He was not nearly as quiet as the priestess, dropping the stack of clean bowls by the doorway again, giving the odd grunt and groan as he found a spot by the fire and rolled around until he was comfortable, before eventually starting to snore. 

Inuyasha returned last. At that point Sesshomaru had closed his eyes and was enjoying some seldom found quiet. It was early hours when the sake-soured mongrel came stumbling back into the hut. He nearly tripped over Jaken before realising Sesshomaru had not left. ‘Goddammit,’ he muttered, speech heavily slurred, ‘you’re still here?’

Sesshomaru cracked open an eye, watching the drunken dog fumble about in the darkness. He tried to wrestle with a futon for a minute, but didn’t seem to be able to figure it out, and ended up collapsing on his back with a grunt, one leg in the air supporting by his foot resting against the wall, and the futon draped over his chest. A deep snort came only moments later, indicating he had either fallen asleep or passed out. 

Despite the cacophony of noises coming from his company, Sesshomaru stayed for a few hours longer. Every time he thought about getting up to leave, a little noise or heavy sigh would come from the human under his arm. It would be no good if she woke while he took his leave, so he patiently waited a little more. In moments of refuge from Jaken’s inane mumbling to himself in his sleep and Inuyasha’s thunderous drunken snore, he could hear Rin’s soft breathing and watched her small body rise and fall with the rhythm of her deep gentle sighs. Once or twice through the night she started to twitch and squirm, perhaps a dream running wild in her mind, but always settled fast. 

It was almost dawn once again before he made the decision to finally leave. Rin had been settled for a while, so he gently laid her down near the embers of the fire, kicked Jaken awake and headed outside. 

Ah-Un was still asleep by the hut, the faithful guard. Sesshomaru touched each of his heads to wake him, running a hand through the thick manes. The beast stirred, Un shaking his head and lifting it enough to look up at Sesshomaru before laying his head down again. Jaken would properly wake the dragon and bring him along when he followed. Sesshomaru set out alone, a slow pace while the darkness still lingered in the morning. 

‘Lord Sesshomaru.’

He barely made it five yards down the path before he heard the old lady’s call. He stopped and half turned to glance at the priestess ambling down the path after him. He waited, certain that whatever she had to say would likely concern Rin. She came up alongside him and smiled. 

‘It is a beautiful yukata you’ve brought her,’ she said, giving a gracious nod. ‘Thank ye, Lord Sesshomaru.’ 

Was that all she wanted? It was the least he felt he should do. He’d noticed on his first visit that Rin had grown, and even more so this time. He commented, something of an explanation for his gift, ‘she’s grown a lot in your care.’

‘Aye,’ the priestess agreed. ‘She eats twice a day now, at the very least. She has much growing to catch up on.’

That would explain the growth spurts she’d experienced. Rin hardly concerned herself with food when she was travelling with him, eating once a day at the most. The added sustenance for her fragile human body would no doubt be helping her grow. 

The priestess’ voice took a more serious tone as she queried, ‘Rin told me that while she was in your care you did not provide food for her.’

Sesshomaru felt slighted, but he couldn’t quite put his finger on the reason why. ‘She was never in my care,’ he retorted, not happy with what the old woman was implying. ‘She simply follow me, and I allowed her to. If she needed food, she had to forage for it herself.’

The old priestess nodded and responded, ‘then I am glad ye has elected to leave her with me. Scrounging about for scraps of food on the forest floor is no way for a child to live.’ She turned to face him, looking up to his face. ‘Think back on the childhood ye experienced, Lord Sesshomaru. No doubt a spoilt child of the palace.’

‘Spoilt?’ Did this old woman have a death wish?

‘Perhaps not,’ she said, retracting her ignominious comment with a shrug and a bow of her head. ‘But I’ll wager ye never had to go without, or worry if ye would have supper before bed. Yet you would inflict such a life on a helpless chil—’

‘I have never imposed anything on Rin,’ he cut her off, his tone chilling a notch. ‘It has always been her choice.’

‘Aye, you’ve said that,’ the priestess said again, her own voice hardening to match his. Did she honestly think she could compete with him in any way? If he so wished she would be dead in the blink of an eye. ‘But can one truly have a choice without knowing all of one’s options?’

He hesitated, not answering her back straight away. Was she implying Rin didn’t have a choice in following him? He glanced at the old woman staring up at him and waited for an explanation.

‘I hope ye understands, in order for her to have a choice, she must have a knowledge of what she is choosing between,’ she said. ‘It is not simply a matter of whether or not she wishes to be with ye. Rin is human, and I feel I have a responsibility to teach her what the life of a human is supposed to be. She cannot truly chose to be with ye until she understands what she must give up in order to do so.’

Her words stuck to him, resonating in his head. He would never admit it aloud but the old lady had a point. Rin had proclaimed a dozen times that she only ever wanted to be with him, but he could tell from the way she talked about her life, from the way she smiled as she learned new things, from the way she giggled and danced and sang, there was a joy in her life that she hadn’t known when she travelled with him. There was no doubt she was enjoying her life here too, at least to some degree. Perhaps, given the opportunity to experience a normal human life, Rin never would’ve chosen to stay with him. She was, after all, a human.

Jaken had finally gotten up and was bringing Ah-Un down the path towards them, a perfectly good reason to leave this wretched human village.

‘I would like Rin to stay with me for a few years more, at least,’ the priestess said.

‘Fine.’ Sesshomaru’s mind was made up without her needing to voice further opinions. Rin deserved the chance at an ordinary life. If Rin decided to stay in the human village then he had no obligation to return, and the old woman was not making his visits any more pleasant. Another visit would not be on his mind for a while yet.

Jaken came to his heel, and it was time to leave. Before he could take a step though, the old woman added, ‘you are welcome to continue your visits, Lord Sesshomaru.’

He cast another glance at the woman, but he didn’t have the patience for her any longer. ‘Let’s go, Jaken,’ he commanded, and set out.

For the millionth time, he wondered if leaving Rin behind was the right decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Credit to this site for some very helpful information on Sesshomaru’s name.  
> https://www.deviantart.com/m-skirvin/journal/Sesshomaru-s-Name-293036908


	8. The Baby Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The arrival of Sango and Miroku’s babies has given rise to Rin’s curiosity, and Miroku has to answer all her questions. Kohaku also returns for a visit, very happy to see his former travelling companion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has taken me a little while, mainly because it deals with some of the more difficult parts of the conversation that is our beautiful SessRin ship. FULL DISCLOSURE: Rin wants to know where babies come from, and she has lots of questions.  
> At this point in the story, Rin is 10, nearly 11. This is the same age as I personally was when I started developing an interest in a THEORETICAL knowledge of intercourse and sexual reproduction. I cannot stress enough that it is purely theoretical, and does not imply that she wants to have sex with anyone at this point in the story.  
> If you feel the need to make comments about Rin’s curiosity not being age appropriate, or anything of the sort, I simply ask that you be respectful and try to refrain from invalidating my own experiences and childhood.

‘Lady Kaede! Please, hurry!’

The monk burst into the hut while Rin and Lady Kaede were enjoying their breakfast, his face pale.

‘Is it time?’ The priestess enquired.

The best the monk could give was a shaky nod and a deep gulp.

‘Very well.’

It was the day Rin had been eagerly anticipating for months, the one thing she was looking forward to (except perhaps for another visit from Lord Sesshomaru). Sango’s labours had started the day before, so it had to be soon, but evidently Miroku was not quite mentally prepared.

Lady Kaede and the young girl set off with the visibly nauseas monk, back to his and Sango’s home. Rin skipped ahead, excitedly chattering about her hopes that the baby would be a girl, and wondering if the rumours might be true that Sango was in fact carrying twins, while Lady Kaede followed, guiding Miroku by the hand. By the time they reached the home only a few hundred yards down the way, Miroku had developed an almost green tinge and his eyes were distant.

‘Rin, would you be so kind as to take monk Miroku to the spring to collect some fresh water?’ Lady Kaede asked.

‘No,’ Miroku insisted, before Rin could even answer. ‘I need to be with Sango.’

Despite his words, his eyes remained fixed on something unseen, and his pale complexion didn’t change.

‘Preposterous,’ Lady Kaede jested, a little laugh in her voice. ‘It is not necessary nor appropriate for a husband to be present for the birth of his child. And I’m sure lady Sango will excuse you. Aye, Sango?’ she called loud enough for the labouring woman to hear over her tense breathing.

‘Yes,’ Sango called back, her voice audibly strained. ‘It’s fine Miroku!’ She added, somewhat quieter, ‘no use us both being sick.’

Miroku’s gaze zoned back in to the present as he blinked a few times and looked down to Lady Kaede. ‘Some water then, monk Miroku?’ she asked.

‘Of course,’ he said, nodding slowly, colour starting to return to his face.

‘Spring water,’ Lady Kaede said again, now that Miroku was present.

‘Yes,’ he affirmed. ‘Clean spring water.’ He picked up a pail sitting by the wall and started off back down the path, walking in a trance as though he were possessed.

Lady Kaede turned and smiled to the young girl. ‘Keep him safe, please Rin.’

Rin grinned and nodded brightly. ‘Of course!’ She turned and skipped after Miroku, singing to herself, ‘ _soon there will be a baby, soon there might be two. Will it be a girl or be a boy? I pray it is healthy and strong for you._ ’

* * *

Rin took Miroku to the stream to collect some of the clear spring water. Then she took him to Lady Kaede’s home to fetch some more clean towels. As they hurried around the village together, stopping to greet the well-wishers and congratulators, Miroku regained some of his normal colour, and even though he was still a little shaken and his feet not quite fully on the ground, he seemed to be adjusting to his new reality.

It was late-morning, and there was still no sign of the baby, or babies. Lady Kaede had suggested Rin take him to the green hill or the flower meadow, hopeful that some fresh air might help clear his ill countenance, so they sat under the tree atop the green hill, Miroku peacefully quiet while Rin hummed a tune and picked some clover flowers to make a crown.

Rin returned to Miroku’s side, bundle of clover in hand, and plopped herself down next to him in the shade. A curious question had come to her while picking the flowers, so as she started her work, gently tying the clover together, she asked, ‘hey Miroku? How do you make a baby?’

‘Hm?’ Miroku tilted his head as he turned to stare wide eyed at the little girl beside him. Her youthful innocence combined with the adult nature of her question was more than a little perturbing. ‘You want to know…’ he asked with wide eyes, his question trailing off.

‘Mm-hm!’ she chirped with an enthusiastic nod. ‘I asked Lady Kaede once, but she wouldn’t tell me,’ she explained. ‘She said I didn’t need to know, but I _want_ to know!’

‘Heh,’ Miroku gave a faint laugh. ‘I’m not surprised.’

‘How come?’ Rin enquired curiously. ‘Is it bad?’

He paused a moment, searching for the words. _Bad_ wasn’t right, nothing about making a child was _bad_. He explained carefully, ‘it’s a very mature conversation.’ After a moment’s consideration though, he added, ‘But I suppose you’re coming to that age now.’

He fell silent again, pondering how on earth he could explain the physical process of conceiving a child without going into too much detail. Once upon a time he would’ve joked, threatening to tell the young girl everything (if only to get a rise out of Sango), but the prospect of becoming a father any minute now was too sobering for him to be joking around.

‘So?’ Rin enquired again, ‘How do you make a baby then?’

Miroku gave a heavy sigh. She would no doubt learn about it sooner or later, and better to gain a theoretical knowledge before some idiot village boy tried to give her a practical lesson. ‘I think,’ he said slowly, trying to quickly think of an animal he could compare the process to, in order to make the explanation easier. ‘Frogs.’

‘Frogs?!’ the little girl cried, drawing back and glaring up at him with horrified eyes.

‘Have you ever seen a tadpole?’ he asked. ‘Or frog spawn?’

Rin shook her head back and forth and murmured, ‘nuh-uh.’

Well that was now useless. ‘Well,’ he continued anyway, ‘in any species, it requires both a male and a female to create a baby. When frogs want to make a baby, the female frog will find a nice spot in the pond to lay her eggs, and the male frog will come along and…’ he paused a moment, wondering how to phrase his words delicately. No doubt anything he said would get back to Lady Kaede sooner or later. He eventually settled on a polite, ‘lay his seed on the eggs.’ He checked Rin for any reaction, any pique in curiosity or grimace of confusion, but she just watched him with deep, keen, interested eyes. He carried on, carefully, ‘when the egg and the seed come together, they form a baby, smaller than a single grain of rice, and the baby grows inside the egg until it is ready to hatch.’

He checked her again, and she gave a little nod, indicating she understood thus far, but still watched and waited for more information. Apparently his frog analogy was not quite enough. Miroku continued his explanation, ‘for humans, women don’t lay eggs. Just as the mother frog finds a nice place in the pond, the best place for a human baby is inside the mother’s belly. So, the man must,’ he paused a moment again, hoping that his choice of words wouldn’t result in any unnecessary awkward follow up questions, ‘lay his seed inside the woman, where it can join with her egg. And then the baby grows inside the woman’s belly until it is ready to be born.’ He finished quickly, hoping that his explanation was enough.

‘Oh,’ was all the young Rin said, before returning her attention to her clovers.

He was in the clear. He had answered her questions, and no follow up, no more probing curiosity or uncomfortable answers. He gave a small sigh of relief. Perhaps Lady Kaede would not be too furious with him.

‘Where do women get their eggs from?’

He seized up. Relief had come too soon, of course she would have more questions. Rin always had more questions, no matter the topic. At least the question wasn’t a difficult one. He answered, trying his best to keep his voice steady, ‘they are inside the woman.’

‘Do all women have eggs?’ she probed further.

Valid question. Some women were infertile, so the answer was no, but he didn’t want to make the girl uneasy or nervous about her own reproductive capabilities, so he answered instead, ‘most do, yes.’

‘Do you think I will have an egg?’

There it was, her question about her own ability. The last thing he needed was the poor girl looking inside herself trying to find her eggs, and she was probably still a little young for her menses to have started anyway, so he swallowed down the creeping nerves her intense questioning had brought up and answered, ‘not yet. You will get your eggs when you’re a little older.’

‘How come?’

_Dear gods she is just full of questions!_

He explained as plainly as he could, ‘little girls cannot make a baby. It is unnatural.’ He added as an afterthought, for all the horrid men who had tried to make a girl as young as Rin conceive, ‘and immoral.’

‘Oh.’ She accepted his answer easily. ‘When will I get my eggs?’

Miroku gave a nervous laugh. ‘You have a lot of questions you know!’ He teased, hoping the girl would ease up her questioning. He couldn’t refuse her curiosity though, and he reminded himself that her learning this way had to be better than an alternative from someone less mature. ‘I’d say,’ he answered, ‘in the next year or two.’

She seemed content with that answer, smiling at him and returning her attention to the flower crown in her hands. Perhaps now, he was in the clear. That really wasn’t so painful.

‘Do all men have seeds?’ she asked next.

Miroku stifled a groan. He had hoped she wouldn’t be so curious about the male’s role in reproducing, but alas. He gave a simple, ‘yes,’ and left it at that.

She turned her head to look up at him, wide brown blinking eyes and sweet smile brightening her soft face. ‘Do you think Lord Sesshomaru has any seeds?’

Miroku felt the blood drain from his face. Sesshomaru? The daiyokai? The ruthless warrior? Demon Lord of the Western Lands? Did he possess in him a single drop of semen? Did he use it? ‘You know,’ Miroku answered honestly, his voice cracking under the tension, ‘I’d never thought of that.’ He tried his hardest to block out the imagery flashing into his mind, Sesshomaru’s firm, bare body, his grasp tight on his rigid—

He shook his head, shuddering away the thoughts. Sesshomaru was a male, and that was all Miroku needed to be aware of to answer her question. ‘I suppose, yes, he would.’

Rin gave a little hm and returned her attention to her flowers.

Miroku glanced at her and couldn’t help but wonder why on earth the girl wanted to know if Sesshomaru could reproduce. Her relationship with Sesshomaru had been puzzling from the start, but he had never questioned if Sesshomaru had any romantic feelings for the child. It was obvious to anyone who knew Sesshomaru that he didn’t have any romantic feelings, toward anyone. No, it was not likely he ever did see Rin in that light, but perhaps it was the other way around?

‘Rin?’ He asked quietly, ‘do you want to make a baby with Lord Sesshomaru?’

Rin was quiet. She continued on weaving and knotting the small flowers together, but after a moment, her little fingers slowed. Still staring at the flowers in her hands, she asked in a voice soft and low, ‘if I were to make a baby with Lord Sesshomaru, it would be a half demon, wouldn’t it?’

Perhaps she had given it some thought before. Everyone knew Rin was completely enamoured with Sesshomaru, for reasons beyond anyone else’s comprehension. The idea that she might also feel a romantic love for him, one that likely would never be returned, brought on a deeply sympathetic ache. Even if perchance, when she grew old enough, she were to copulate with Sesshomaru, any child would have to be a hanyo, something that Sesshomaru despised with all his being. He answered her question with a gentle, ‘yes.’

Rin gave another contemplative hm. Her fingers resumed their weaving and knotting, and stated, rather matter-of-fact, ‘Lord Sesshomaru doesn’t like half demons.’

Miroku stared at the young girl. For someone her age, she was surprisingly accepting of the facts of life. Perhaps she didn’t think of Sesshomaru romantically, or perhaps she was just curious. He wasn’t sure if he should push the girl further for more information, why she was so interested in Sesshomaru’s ability to have children, what she felt toward him, and he toward her.

No, it was not his place. If she wanted to share her feelings with him, she would, that much he knew. Rin was rarely shy in talking or sharing. It wasn’t likely she would know what Sesshomaru thought of her either. Probably no one knew that, possibly not even Sesshomaru. Miroku added quietly, musing his thoughts aloud to possibly bring a little comfort to whatever feelings she had for the demon lord, ‘he’s not awfully fond of humans either. But then there’s you.’

Rin didn’t respond, but she gave a little smile to herself.

Miroku’s curiosity flared. Rin seemed to know Sesshomaru better than anyone, perhaps even better than the imp Jaken. More than once he had heard Rin talk of the _bond_ between Sesshomaru and herself, but whatever constituted that bond was beyond anyone else’s understanding. Everyone knew Sesshomaru felt _something_ for her, otherwise he wouldn’t come back to visit, wouldn’t bring her lavish gifts. But surely Sesshomaru knew she was just a child? Or perhaps he was waiting for her to grow old enough? He was near immortal after all, and had all the time in the world to wait for her.

Or perhaps she was just a ward to him. Someone to entertain. He didn’t visit that often, and was happy to leave her in Kaede’s care every time, no matter how gloomy it made Rin when he left. The sympathetic ache crept back into his mind for the young girl, hoping that she didn’t feel something for Sesshomaru that wasn’t returned. He suggested, ‘perhaps it would be better for you to choose a human to have a baby with?’

‘No thanks,’ she responded. Miroku struggled to hide his grimace, sorry for the poor child that might be suffering an unrequited love, but only for a moment until she added, ‘I don’t want a baby right now.’

Relief washed over him. ‘That’s good,’ he said with a grateful sigh, and leant back against the tree. At least she wouldn’t be exploring her body to find eggs, or looking for a boy’s seeds any time soon. He shuddered at the thought of the punishment he might suffer if Kaede were to find Rin doing such a thing. It would be much safer for Miroku if Kaede never knew this conversation happened.

‘Rin?’ he asked quietly. ‘I think this conversation should stay between us.’

‘How come?’ she queried.

He gave her an expedient smile and said, ‘you said yourself Lady Kaede didn’t want you to know these things. You don’t want me to get into trouble now would you?’

Rin giggled back at him, a knowing smile twinkling in her eyes. ‘Sure.’

* * *

The babies (yes, two of them!) came by mid afternoon. Two beautiful twin girls entered the world, one after the other, near inseparable from each other. By the time Rin and Miroku returned to the home, the little babes were cleaned, clothed and bundled up in warm blankets in Sango’s arms.

Rin did not miss the little drops twinkling in Miroku’s eyes as he stumbled across the room and dropped to his knees by his wife. No words were needed. His hands gently reached for them, fingers brushing across a new little forehead, down a plump little cheek, before coming to his wife, cupping her face in his palms and pressing a kiss to her forehead.

Lady Kaede took Rin back to their home, leaving the new family in peace for a while, with a promise to return with some supper later. They gathered some ingredients on the way back to their home and set about preparing a simple meal for all of them to enjoy. Rin told Lady Kaede about her day with Miroku, but remembered her promise to him that she wouldn’t say anything about what he had taught her.

As the sun set in the western sky, Rin and Lady Kaede headed back to visit Sango and Miroku and their new family additions. Shippo joined them, having returned from his stay at the fox demon inn, excited to meet the little babies. When they returned to the family’s home, there was an extra one already there.

‘Kohaku!’ Rin cried as she bounced into the room. Her favourite demon slayer sat against the wall, one little babe bundled in his arms. A small smile was fixed on his face, but almost dropped in awe when he looked up to see Rin rushing over to him. ‘It’s so good to see you!’

‘Hiya Rin,’ he said with a wavering smile and a little blush. ‘How’ve you been?’

‘Well, thank you,’ she responded with a bright grin. ‘How about you?’

His eyes dropped down, only for a second, before looking up to the sweet young girl smiling at him. ‘Alright, I suppose.’

Rin’s attention turned to the sweet little baby in his arms and she shuffled closer on her knees. She was just a tiny face, and one frail hand bundled up in white cloth, peacefully sleeping. Her skin was pale and pure, a dark fuzz like momo fur atop her head, and sweet pink lips, slightly parted and quivering with each gentle breath. Rin cooed quietly, ‘look at how cute she is.’

Kohaku smiled down at the little baby. ‘I know,’ he murmured. ‘She’s so tiny.’

Rin turned her sparkling grin up to Kohaku. ‘Could I hold her?’

‘Sure,’ Kohaku replied, only too eagerly. ‘If that’s okay, sister?’

‘Of course,’ Sango said. ‘Just be gentle.’

Kohaku moved on to his knees and held out the sleeping baby, passing her into Rin’s eagerly waiting arms. She took the baby carefully, cradling its soft head gently in the crook of her elbow and wrapping her arm around to support the baby. She was so light, so small, so peaceful. ‘Wow.’

She gazed down at the sweet sleeping baby. She was so impossibly tiny, her little head no bigger than Rin’s hand. It wouldn’t be long now and she could think about having a sweet sleeping bundle of joy of her own. The tiny girl was so adorable, but she wondered for a second if this was what she wanted. For so long now, she had wanted nothing more than to venture out and travel with Lord Sesshomaru again, but maybe Miroku was right. Would she be better off finding a nice boy to marry and have a family with? Was there any way she could have both? A life with Lord Sesshomaru and a family, that would be wonderful.

‘That look suits you, Rin,’ Kohaku said quietly.

‘Huh?’

Kohaku’s eyes went wide when she looked up at him, and he turned his gaze down, a pinkness creeping across his cheeks. ’Uh, I mean,’ he stammered, ‘your smile, with the baby. It looks pretty.’ He glanced up at her, his pinkness deepening. ‘I mean, not that you’re not always pretty,’ he quickly corrected. ‘But just, with a baby in your arms.’ She grinned at him, the smile of the bright rising sun reaching up to bring light into her eyes, causing Kohaku’s cheeks to burn with a red tinge. ‘N-not that you should have a baby!’ he stuttered. ‘Just that you look p-pretty, with the baby, and smiling.’ He gingerly rubbed the back of his head and stared down at the ground and muttered, ‘I’ll just stop talking now.’

Rin just giggled. Kohaku was always so sweet, and more often than not fairly nervous too, but she enjoyed how funny he could be when he was lost for words. But he always meant well. ‘Thanks, Kohaku.’

On the other side of the room, Sango and Miroku shared a knowing smile and a secret little laugh.

* * *

After supper, Lady Kaede invited Kohaku to stay with her for the night, knowing full well that the babies would no doubt wake in the night and the new parents would not get a good night’s sleep. As they all headed back to Lady Kaede’s house, Shippo talked with Lady Kaede about the new trick he learnt at the academy, Rin skipped ahead and Kohaku caught up to chat with her. She slowed her skip and they walked side by side under the moonlight back towards the house.

‘You’ve got a new yukata?’ he asked, admiring the beautiful purple and white dress.

‘Yep.’ She twirled around in a circle, spinning on her bare toes. ‘It was a present from Lord Sesshomaru!’

‘He’s been visiting, has he?’ Kohaku questioned.

Rin nodded. ‘Twice now,’ she confirmed. ‘I’ll have to show you the bracelet he brought me the first time. It’s beautiful!’ She gave a little jump and a skip, thinking fondly on the time her Lord Sesshomaru visited and gifted her the delicate golden bracelet.

‘Is he well?’ Kohaku asked.

‘Of course!’ she chirped. ‘He’s been slaying many demons that are trying to take over the Western Lands.’

Kohaku watched Rin skip and dance down the path, her hands clasped behind her back and bright smile fixed on her face. ‘Mm,’ he murmured. ‘I’ve noticed a lot of demons have come out again, since Naraku was defeated. I think it was a good decision to leave you in the village.’

Rin’s skipping stopped and she slowed to a walk, just ahead of Kohaku. ‘I know,’ she said quietly. ‘Master Jaken always told me I was such a burden.’

‘Oh.’ His tone dropped a notch. ‘I didn’t mean it like that,’ he quickly corrected. ‘Just that it’s safer here. You’ve got Sango and Miroku and Inuyasha to protect you, and all the villagers.’

She was quiet for a moment, continuing forward. It wasn’t as though she needed Inuyasha, or anyone, to protect her. ‘Lord Sesshomaru always protected me anyway,’ she murmured.

‘W-well, yeah,’ Kohaku stammered. ‘I just meant that… here, you’re less likely to be attacked. Not that Lord Sesshomaru would ever let anything happen to you anyway.’

She turned to smile at the stuttering boy. She knew he didn’t mean anything offensive, he respected Lord Sesshomaru as much as she did. Perhaps he was just afraid that Lord Sesshomaru might overhear him. She giggled, memories of all the times Master Jaken would say something inappropriate flooding back to her. ‘You’re funny Kohaku.’

His face flushed bright red, clearly visible even in the dim light. ‘Oh,’ he murmured, ‘am I? I didn’t mean…’

She giggled again and reached forward to grab his hand. ‘It’s a good thing,’ she teased. ‘Come on, I’ll race you back to the hut!’

‘Huh?’ She turned and pulled him along for two steps before releasing his hand and racing off. Kohaku hesitated only a moment, but quickly rushed after her, calling out, ‘hey, wait!’ He didn’t want to pass up an opportunity to see her smile, even for a second.


	9. The Flower Meadow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sesshomaru visits Rin again, eager to spend some time in her soothing presence, and perhaps see if she wants to join him again.

The little imp droned on, babbling about Rin’s _audacity_ that she expect him to visit her, in her meagre human village, at how he shouldn’t need to visit her so frequently, and there were far more important things that he, Lord Sesshomaru, needed to attend to. He only half listened, the words drifting in one ear and straight out the other. Perhaps, if his tiny vassal were not so vexatious, he would not want to return to see Rin as frequently as he did.

The village and its farms were nestled in the valley before them, flanked by mountains all around. It reeked of humans, their putrid stench harsh on his sensitive nose. He ignored it as best he could and scented the wind for her. Where was his Rin?

He followed the trail of her scent, catching it when the wind blew in the right direction. She wasn’t in the village, rather somewhere slightly to the north, and he presumed she would be in the rice paddies, where it seemed most of the human women were today. As he skirted around the village, Inuyasha’s scent grew stronger. He was everywhere in the village, his dull odour still clear over all the humans’. The noxious smells mixed with Jaken’s inane rambling was a recipe for a mighty headache, but hopefully one that Rin would be able to cure. 

He heard the footsteps pattering on the rooftop, the halfbreed’s scent growing stronger on the wind moments before his _darling_ little brother dropped to the ground in front of him. One more headache to endure.

‘Back again, huh?’ Inuyasha barked dryly. He seemed about as excited to see Sesshomaru as he was to have to endure Inuyasha.

‘You’re in my way.’

Inuyasha took a step forward, placing his hand on the Tetsusaiga and himself directly in Sesshomaru’s path. ‘When are you gonna get it through your thick head that she’s better off without you?’ he snapped.

He gave Inuyasha a carefully blank stare. How dare he presume to know Rin better than he did? He asked the half demon, a chill in his tone, ‘I suppose you know what’s best for Rin?’

‘I’ve spent more time with her than you ever have,’ Inuyasha barked. ‘Do you have any idea how sad she gets when you leave?’

He held back his tongue. He had an inkling that Rin tended to be melancholy each time he left her, but he tried to stay with her as long as he could bear in the human village. Surely his bright ray of sunshine would not be so miserable while he were not around though? Just the thought of her morose face crumbling with sadness and dripping with tears brought a bubbling rage in to the pit of his stomach. Nothing was allowed to bring pain to his Rin.

But if it were his own fault…

‘Inuyasha!’ Jaken squawked as he marched forward. ‘Do you dare to presume that—’

‘That’s enough, Jaken,’ Sesshomaru cut him off.

The little imp blinked up at him briefly before quickly backing down with a humble, ‘yes, m’lord.’

‘If you want what’s best for Rin, you’d leave now and never come back,’ Inuyasha growled at him. ‘Let her move on with her life.’

Ahh, of course. This had nothing to do with him, or Rin, and everything to do with his human woman he long since lost to the meido and her _sacred well_. He longed to move on with his life, and therefore insisted that Rin do the same. But of course, Sesshomaru would not stand to let this halfbreed dictate to Rin what she should do. He moved forward again, skirting around Inuyasha as he said, ‘I suppose you might feel that way after your human woman left you. But I have no intention of abandoning Rin.’

Inuyasha spun on his heel, a growl tearing from his throat into something of a mild roar. He shouted after Sesshomaru heading down the path, ‘do you even know what you’re doing here?’

He always asked the stupidest questions. Sesshomaru answered plainly without stopping or turning, ‘I am here to see Rin.’

He carried on down the path, toward his Rin. Inuyasha barked after him, calling out his name, but he didn’t stop again, not eager to worsen his headache.

Sesshomaru followed the path and her scent towards the rice paddies, Jaken and Ah-Un in tow. The air cleared somewhat, and her comforting scent guided him, the oils in her hair and on her skin and familiar scent of the earth on her palms and feet. Even from a distance he could tell her scent had changed, a slightly sour note to it, but it was still undoubtedly Rin.

He came to the path that led past the water fields, looking out across the patchwork landscape. Half a dozen village women were working in the fields, sewing seedlings in the shallow waters, their yukata tied up above their knees. He spotted Rin in no time, her purple yukata tied high around her thighs since she was shorter than the other women in the field. She was half hidden under a sugegasa, which pleased him to know that she was caring for her skin and protecting herself from the sun. He watched her for a while, wading backwards with a bunch of rice seedlings in one hand, poking them into the water with the other. She finished with her handful of seedlings before standing up, leaning back slightly to stretch and looking up to the sky. Her eyes landed on him as she straightened up.

‘Lord Sesshomaru!’

Her youthful face broke into a bright grin. She grabbed her yukata and dashed through the ankle deep waters for the nearest dry path. Her pace quickened once she was free of the waters and her sugegasa even fell back to hang from her neck as she ran, with all the energy of a bird free of it’s cage, towards him.

Her energy and enthusiasm brought back wonderful memories of her days in her childhood, when she would always greet him with delight. It warmed him through to know that she still wanted to see him as much as ever, that she had not forgotten him or _moved on_ as Inuyasha insisted she should.

She leapt to a standstill in front of him, panting lightly with her parted lips forming a smile that covered half her face. ‘I’m so glad you’re back!’ she exclaimed. ‘How are you, my lord?’

‘I am well, thank you Rin,’ he said with a small nod. ‘How are you?’ It struck him as he asked that it was not a question he asked often, but for her he was keenly interested.

‘I’m wonderful, now that you’re here,’ she chirped, bouncing on her toes. Her eyes diverted to Jaken behind him. ‘And Master Jaken too!’ she cried. She dropped to her knees and snatched Jaken by the hand, dragging him in to her to smother him in a hug, despite his squawking protests. She clutched him to her chest and swung him side to side, his legs flapping around. She had grown again, taller than Jaken even on her knees.

Rin released Jaken and he stumbled about as he regained his balance while Rin leapt to her feet again, turning her attention to Ah-Un. She greeted each of the dragon heads in turn, giving them a tight hug around their neck and asking them of their wellbeing. While the dragons didn’t speak, they understood her, nodding and giving grunts and groans in response to her questions. Jaken tried to chastise her for being so silly to question the dragons, but she ignored him, as always.

She hadn’t changed a bit. And yet, she had changed so much.

The purple yukata suited her well, and he was very pleased with his decision. While he had always been fond of the little girl in the orange dress, bringing all the energy and warmth of the summer sun to his long travelling days, she wore the royal colour with a charm and liveliness that he found so endearing. Unlike the taut stuffiness that the colour embodied in his mother’s palace, she made the striking tone come alive.

Her hair had grown longer, though it was still thick and messy as always. She had managed to do away with most of the twigs and leaves that resided in her tresses at least. Her hands and feet were cleaner as well, perhaps if only from spending her morning wading through ankle deep water burying rice seedlings, but the scent of the earth still clung to her skin. He checked as she raised a foot while giving Un another tight embrace, and the sole of her foot was still darkened, although not as black as it once was.

He was eternally grateful her smile, her laugh, had not changed one bit. She scolded Ah for being mean to his brother, and pressed a pouty cheek against the scaly dragon’s jowl, mumbling with a babyish coo, ‘how could you be mean to this beautiful boy?’ before finishing with a sweet giggle and a kiss to Un’s forehead.

She had grown, but she had not changed at all.

The wind blew from her direction, bringing her scent towards him and a calm coming over him. The headache that had been growing on him was gone with the tranquility her presence brought him.

However, it bothered him that her scent had changed. Why was it sour now? What had happened that caused this change?

It came to him when she lifted one arm to give Ah a flick on the forehead, reprimanding him for bullying the other head. Beneath her arm was the cause of the scent, the sour odour humans developed when their bodies transitioned from children to adults. It was faint enough that only he, or possibly Inuyasha, would be able to pick up on it, but it was there nonetheless. She was no longer a little child, now beginning her journey to becoming a woman.

The mere idea jolted his heart. The sweet little girl was growing up, and he had not been here to witness it. Perhaps Inuyasha was right. The half demon had spent more time with Rin than he ever had, and she was not a little girl anymore.

The breeze changed direction and he picked up on the old lady’s scent, a marked sour note to it mixed with herbs, tea, and soaps. She stepped up alongside him. ‘Lord Sesshomaru, what an honour it is to see you again.’

He glanced down to the woman beside him, not even reaching his shoulder. She smiled up to him, courteous, professional, and he gave a simple nod. Human though she was, she always showed him the utmost respect, and cared well for Rin. The least he could do was acknowledge the woman.

‘Ye have arrived much earlier than before,’ the old priestess commented. ‘Rin still has much work to do today.’

Rin spun around, her face long with agony. ‘Oh, Lady Kaede, please!’ she begged, ‘can I just have a little while with Lord Sesshomaru?’

The old woman gave a small chuckle to herself. ‘Aye, child,’ she said. ‘You may have as long as you like with your lord.’

Rin’s face broke into a grin again, as she bounced forward to throw her arms around the old woman. ‘Thank you Lady Kaede!’ she cried, nearly knocking the aged lady on her ass. The old lady gave a smile, and it was somewhat reminiscent of the way he tended to catch himself smiling at her.

She broke away from the priestess as quickly as she had pounced on her, before turning her cheery smile to him. ‘Come on!’ she said ecstatically, reaching for his hand. ‘The flower meadow is in bloom, I have to show you!’ She grasped his hand, her warm fingers pulling him around only a moment until he was facing the right direction, before her hand slid away and rushing off to grab Jaken’s hand and Ah-Un’s reins, skipping down the path.

The warmth from her touch lingered in his palm. He closed his fingers around it, holding on to that warmth as he followed, watching his sweet Rin bound off. She chattered to Jaken as she dragged him down the path, ‘I’ve missed you so much, Master Jaken. I made you a present too! Your own little futon that you can fold up and take with you!’

‘Lord Sesshomaru.’

The aged priestess called after him before he got far. He stopped and half turned his head to cast his gaze backwards at her.

‘Would ye please bring her home for supper?’

He glanced at Rin down the path. Perhaps he had been wondering if she would be inclined to follow him again. No, it was not just wondering, but he couldn’t allow himself to hope. It was Rin’s decision. If her decision was to stay in the village then he would of course ensure she was safe back at home before supper. He gave the old lady another glance and a curt, ‘of course,’ before turning and following down the path again.

He reaffirmed to himself, no matter what he wanted, it was always Rin’s decision.

* * *

He instantly knew why Rin enjoyed this flower meadow as they came to the clearing. Brightly coloured wildflowers lay thick and tall across the ground, decorating the verdant grass in all the colours of the sunset. Pollen wafted on the air, a strong fragrance that threatened his senses, but combined with Rin’s made for a soothing, nostalgic scent. 

Rin dropped Jaken’s hand and released Ah-Un’s reigns before dashing forward, leaping into the meadow and twirling around, her arms wide. She spun and spun, throwing her head back to the sky, an infectious giggle bubbling from her mouth, until she stumbled over her own feet and fell backwards, flopping down to disappear in to the tall flowers. Her giggle signified she was at least unharmed.

‘Oh that silly girl,’ Jaken scolded. ‘She hasn’t grown up at all.’ He stepped into the meadow, disappearing into the flowers, the two-headed staff and the peak of his eboshi the only visible sign of where he was.

Rin sat up, her head and shoulders popping up above the line of the flowers, and called out tauntingly, ‘where are you Master Jaken? I can’t see you?!’

‘I’m right here you silly girl!’

‘Where? Are you lost in the flowers? Do you need me to rescue you?’

Here was finally his chance to relax. Jaken would be preoccupied with Rin’s antics and safety, so he had an opportunity to rest in peace. A few yards to his right was a large tree providing ample shade. He crossed over and took a seat between the roots erupting from the earth, while Ah-Un wandered about, trying to find a sunny spot near the edge of the meadow. Sesshomaru sat back to watch his companions entertainment.

After locating Jaken, Rin did not let him out of her sight. She led him around the meadow, picking out flowers and describing to him the ones with practical and medicinal qualities. For the ones that had no use, she gave him a long explanation of their meaning, the significance of their colour, and implications when giving such flora as a gift.

Sesshomaru listened, his eyes half closed, as Rin picked out various flowers with pertinent meanings; honour, glory, strength, and grace. Even Jaken seemed to enjoy himself as he toddled around with Rin. He giggled madly when she presented him with a rare deep violet tulip that signified respect, and swatted her away when she tried to tuck a pink flower into the strap of his eboshi behind his ear. After a while, she asked Jaken to help her find some red shiso, so she could prepare him some more umeboshi. They set off around the meadow and it’s surrounds searching for the plant.

She gathered a large armful of colourful flowers while prancing about in the meadow, leaving the shiso to Jaken. When she couldn’t carry any more she made her way over to the patch of grass in the shade of Sesshomaru’s tree. She sat peacefully, arranging some of the longer stemmed flowers together in a small pile, humming a tune to herself. Sesshomaru watched as she chose her flowers from the ones she had gathered, mostly white ones with the occasional red or violet blossom, surrounded by long leaves. When she finished her arrangement she glanced around. She took a long blade of grass and tied it around the stems to form a sturdy bouquet.

Satisfied with her work, bright smile evidence of her pride, she took up the bouquet. She bore the flower gift in her arms, and came to stand by Sesshomaru’s side. ‘Here, Lord Sesshomaru,’ she said, proffering the bouquet to him. ‘This is for you.’

He reached up to accept the gift and she gently handed it down to him. She dropped to her knees beside him and pointed to a stem of small red flowers. ‘This one means honour,’ she explained. She pointed to two large white kiku flowers, adding, ‘and these mean loyalty.’ She moved her finger to one of the magenta flowers dotted through the bouquet. ‘The kingyoso mean grace and strength. The take leaves are for strength too, and the gekkeiju leaves are for glory.’ She waved her finger about, pointing to the whole arrangement, or rather the smaller flowers that filled the gaps, finishing, ‘and the suikazura are for love!’

_Love?_

The insidious word, the one that only leads to weakness, desperation, fear and death. She associated him with _love?!_

Her other choices in the bouquet had been rather emblematic, glory, honour, grace, strength, these were all things he knew well and appreciated. But _love?_ Why _love?_

‘Do you like it?’

Her chirping question pierced his mind. He turned his gaze to her, her bright hopeful smile shining upon him. She had put a lot of thought into her arrangement, clearly, and it was no doubt pretty. He answered her expectant smile, ‘it is beautiful.’

Her smile widened, filling her face and lighting up her eyes. ‘Wonderful!’ She cried as she jumped to her feet, then spun in a circle. She dashed back to the spot where she had left the remaining flowers and gathered them up. ‘Ah-Un! Shall I braid your hair with flowers today?’ she called to the dragon lazing in the sun.

Sesshomaru looked down to the flowers resting in his lap. Honour. Loyalty. Grace and strength. Glory. All of these, yes, were things he strove for, things that drove him, that he worked so hard to achieve.

Love?

Why that? Why love? Why that wretched emotion? That disastrous human sensation that took his father, that tormented him, the one he evaded for centuries. Why did Rin associate _that_ with him?

Humans were such strange creatures.

Rin knelt by Un, weaving flowers into his mane, folding the thick strands of hair over and into itself, entangled with the stems of the flowers, and told the dragon what each of the flowers meant, which ones they could and couldn’t eat. By tomorrow Jaken would have to untangle the dead plants from the manes, but for now it made Rin happy.

He looked down to the flowers in his lap again. The suikazura dotted through the arrangement, dozens of dainty petals and thin stamen filling the voids of the bouquet. What did she see that made her think…?

It was unimportant. She had given him a gift, as she had so many times, that was all that mattered. He also had a gift to give.

‘Rin,’ he called out to her.

Her head snapped up to look across to him. ‘Yes, m’lord?’

‘Bring Ah-Un here.’

Rin jumped up and coaxed the sleepy dragon to its feet, bringing him and her bundle of flowers back to the shade of Sesshomaru’s tree. At Sesshomaru’s beckon, Ah-Un trudged to his master’s side, before dropping himself down. Sesshomaru reached into one of the pockets of the dragon’s saddle bag and pulled out her gift; a flat box a little bigger than his hand, wrapped in a pink and orange silk cloth.

‘What is it, Lord Sesshomaru?’

Rin knelt by the dragon, leaning forward to inspect the parcel, head tilting to one side, squeezing her hands in her lap. He held it by one end toward her. ‘Open it and see for yourself.’

Her wide eyes blinked at the gift, then up to his eyes. ‘For me?’ she asked. ‘Thank you Lord Sesshomaru!’ She bowed deeply at the waist, lifting her arms above her head in thanks. He lowered the gift to her waiting hands and she took hold of it, rising up to examine the box. ‘It’s so beautiful, I don’t want to open it!’ she whispered delightedly, staring awestruck at the box in her hands.

It was nothing too fancy to be perfectly honest. It was a simple silk tied in a basic knot, nothing spectacular, only a wrapping for the present. Her delicate fingers picked at the knot, pulling until a loop formed and then she could untie it. The silk came loose, falling over her hands, revealing the wooden box. She gently lifted the lid.

Inside the box, nestled on a cushion of white silk, sat a fine kushi kanzashi set; a hair pin and matching comb. Both were made from a dark ebony, lacquered several times to make them shine like still waters on a sunny day, and inlaid with pink tinged pearl shaped in an ume blossom pattern, with stems joining the flowers in streaks of gold. It was a relic from a time long past, something not many women today wore, but he hoped she might enjoy a change of style every so often.

‘It’s beautiful…’

Her voice was soft and distant, gazing at the gift. She placed the lid on the ground and hesitantly inched her hand closer. Her fingers ran over the hair pin. ‘It’s so shiny.’ She picked up the comb, and laid the box on the ground to inspect the detailed pattern. ‘Wow.’ Her sparkling eyes turned up to him. ‘Can I wear it now?’

He nodded with a gentle, ‘hm.’

A gleeful smile broke out on her face. She placed the comb down again and reached up to pull the little orange ribbon from her hair. The ribbon fluttered to the ground while she gathered the short tuft of hair and twisted it over before pushing the comb into her hair. ‘Oh, ouch,’ she winced, scrunching her nose up. She tried to pull the comb out, but it was already tangled in her knots. ‘Oh no.’ She wiggled the comb, dislodging it from her hair with some painful winces and sharp ouches. ‘Maybe after I comb my hair,’ she said, laying the hairpiece down in the box again.

Sesshomaru reached in to the fold of his furisode and pulled out the fine silver comb he kept for his own hair. He held his comb out for Rin.

‘Oh!’ Her wide eyes landed on the silver comb he offered to her. She sat frozen for a moment then reached forward to accept the comb. ‘Thank you m’lord.’ She pulled her hair over her shoulder, and working slowly from the ends of her hair combed out her knots.

He sat peacefully and watched her. She was so fixed on her task, pursing her lips and carefully sectioning her hair to work through small pieces at a time. Her tongue poked out of the corner of her lips, her nose scrunching with concentration. Did it really require so much attention to comb her hair?

‘Lady Kaede tells me I should comb my hair every day.’ Rin mused aloud, still remaining focussed on her task. ‘I guess she’s right.’

A little smile curled one corner of his lips, pleased with the old woman’s teachings. ‘Tell me, Rin,’ he said, ‘what else have you learnt?’

‘Oh.’ Her bright eyes turned up to him. ‘Well,’ she started, ‘I have been learning more calligraphy. Lady Kaede says I’m getting good at it now.’ She continued combing her hair, and added further, ‘I’ve also been learning lots of different foods to cook. And how to preserve the fruits I’ve been growing for you. You can take some with you, if you like.’

Sesshomaru sat and listened while Rin combed her hair and told him what she had been doing since she last saw him. She told him of her adventures in the village, her daily routines of tending to the fields, lessons with Lady Kaede and then playing with the other children, or with Inuyasha and Shippo of an afternoon. She told him of Kohaku’s visit, of the twins’ birth and how wonderful it was to get to help with the new babies. She told him of a day when a village boy had taunted her for wearing such a fancy yukata, questioning who she thought she was, and why she, a nobody, had such fancy clothes. And she told him of how Inuyasha had defended her, telling the boy that Lord Sesshomaru (or rather the giver of the gift yukata), would not be merciful to anyone who bullied her. She told him of how she still thought of him every day, still started her every day by checking on the bracelet he gave her, and now she was delighted to have another gift from him, to treasure dearly and remind her of him.

After a good while, Jaken toddled back to them, arms full of purple shiso leaves piled up to his face. He could barely see over the leaves, and they heard a muffled call of, ‘I hope this is enough Rin!’ before he tripped on a raised tree root. The leaves flew up as Jaken fell down and he landed flat on his face.

Rin burst out laughing. She threw her head back, arms wrapped around her stomach, gleeful smile turned up to the sky and eyes squeezed shut. Only for a brief moment did she let her unabashed cry of infectious laughter burst from her grin, before she noticed herself, one hand flying up to cover her mouth. She couldn’t completely hide her smile though, nor could she hide the twinkling light in her eyes as she turned to look at Jaken, the purple leaves floating down around him. ‘Oh Master Jaken,’ she teased before reaching over to him to help him up. ‘You’re so silly.’

Jaken argued with her as the two of them gathered up the shiso. Sesshomaru sat and watched his companions, basking in the sweet warmth that was Rin’s laughter. So seldom did he hear laughter these days; Jaken didn’t get humour, he always took everything so seriously, and he couldn’t tolerate anyone else’s company. Rin’s melodic laughter, like the twittering of a flock of birds just before dawn, the peaceful good morning call, was soothing to his raging mind. It brought him such peace he didn’t even notice the smile creep upon his lips. He closed his eyes a moment, focussing on that sweet laughter, the lilting voice, and brilliant smile, locking it away in his memories. A memory to be called upon whenever Jaken was being his insufferable self.

His face returned to the careful neutral, all traces of his moment of happiness gone by the time the pair had finished collecting up the shiso, Rin gathering the leaves into a handkerchief. She pressed the leaves flat and tied them up in a little bundle to take back to the village.

The group sat for a while longer still and Jaken took over the conversation, at Rin’s behest. She wanted to know all about what they had been up to since their last visit. As Jaken rambled, Rin finished combing her hair and was now successfully able to slide the decorative comb into her hair, pinning up the short clip of hair usually tied in a ribbon.

‘How does it look?’ she asked, interrupting Jaken’s tale of the bull demon that had tried to assault them one evening. Rin sat on her knees, legs folded underneath her and hands resting in her lap. Her hair was tamed, all leaves and knots gone, and in place of the childish tuft of hair was the lacquered comb. Her fringe swept softly over her forehead, shading her honey-brown eyes. Gone was the child he once knew. Before him sat a burgeoning lady.

‘Hm,’ Jaken said curiously with a tilt of his head. ‘You could almost pass for a lady, Rin.’

‘Almost?’ she cried incredulously. ‘What do you mean, _almost_?! I am a lady!’

Evidently, Sesshomaru was not the only one to notice that she had grown. Jaken was correct though, she was not quite a lady yet. Her argumentative outrage at Jaken was perhaps the most noticeable evidence that she had not completely changed. It brought him peace of mind, knowing that even though she was growing, maturing, becoming a lady, she was at heart still the young defiant girl who found him in the woods.

After sorely losing her argument with Jaken, when he told her that a proper lady would not have such an outburst, especially in the presence of her lord, she resigned with a scowl and a pout. She turned her attention to Sesshomaru and asked his opinion of her new accessory instead, ‘do you think it looks okay, Lord Sesshomaru?’

He gazed upon her for a moment. ‘The comb suits you,’ he said decidedly. ‘The scowl does not.’

Her eyes widened for a moment with surprise. ‘Oh.’ Her smile returned as she added, ‘then I shall smile instead.’

Rin resumed braiding Ah-Un’s manes, weaving the last of her flowers into his hair, while Jaken continued his stories. The sun passed over the sky, dipping down into the afternoon while the young girl lazed in the dappled light, listening fondly to the tales of her Lord Sesshomaru. Jaken managed to throw in a few stories of himself as well, and Rin didn’t even seem to mind, giggling and gazing fondly at her dearest friends.

Often times when she had been travelling with him, she had drifted off, or lost concentration when Jaken had started rambling, but not today. Today she was rapt. Several times Sesshomaru noticed that she was gazing at him, her mind adrift in Jaken’s tale, but eyes fixed on the lord in front of her. He would glance at her when he noticed her unwavering attention, and she would quickly blink and avert her eyes, but only for a second until she gave a little smile up at him. He felt the careful neutral of his face soften under the soothing warmth of her smile and radiance of her chestnut eyes. The gleeful human girl had carved out a place for herself under his battle hardened armour, her softness and warmth permeating his very being. If it were anyone else, he might be mad if they even attempted to draw out such emotions from him, but for Rin, he allowed, he permitted himself to feel her joy.

The sun was nearing the horizon when Rin’s belly began to rumble. She ignored it for a good while, contentedly laying in the meadow, listening and lazing. It wasn’t long though until an audible growl from her stomach interrupted Jaken’s storytelling. She hadn’t eaten a thing since they came to the meadow, so perhaps it would be best to take her back to the village for supper. He had promised the old lady after all.

Ah-Un also needed food, and had become an expert in catching fish. No doubt Rin would enjoy some fish with her supper as well, and perhaps even the old woman, so Sesshomaru instructed Jaken to take the dragon to the river and catch some fish for them all. Jaken interpreted this as Rin would be assisting him, but Sesshomaru quickly corrected when Jaken tried to lead her away that he would walk her back to the village, and that Jaken could manage fine on his own. It did not pass his keen attention that Jaken seemed a little dejected, but Rin was delighted to spend some more time with her lord. Nor did he miss Rin’s little gasp of surprise and sweet giggle as he tucked the gift bouquet into the sash on his waist, opposite his swords.

Rin pointed Jaken in the right direction and he trudged off towards the river with the dragon. She then gathered up her ribbon, the bundle of shiso leaves, the kushi kanzashi box and its silk wrapping, before walking side by side with Sesshomaru back towards the village, back to her home as he promised he would deliver her. It felt more and more likely that once again, she would stay in the village.

Perhaps Inuyasha was right. As idiotic as the thought was, he had been living with Rin for about two years now, longer than Rin had travelled with Sesshomaru in her younger days. And while he knew Rin was no doubt sad when he left her in the priestess’ care after each visit, he didn’t truly know the extent of it. She was human. Her fleeting life would pass in an instant. Perhaps it would be better spent with her own kind. Perhaps he shouldn’t continue to drag on their relationship with vain hope that she would want to travel in his company once again.

But the thought of giving her up, of never again seeing her sweet smile, hearing her infectious giggle, of letting her go forever, twinged an uncomfortable nerve in his chest. He had never been one to do anything he didn’t want to do, and giving up Rin was certainly something he did not want to do.

_It is her choice though._

He reaffirmed in his mind, that it did not matter what he wanted. Rin’s life was her own, with her own choices and decisions to make, regardless of what he or Inuyasha thought. Perhaps though it would ease his mind to know what she thought.

‘Rin,’ he mused, keeping his gaze cast forward. ‘Does it upset you when I leave?’

‘Huh?’ Her wide eyes turned up to him, her brow creasing in confusion. ‘Well…’ she started. ‘I do miss you…’ Her words trailed off as her face turned down to the ground. It was obvious that she was withholding her true thoughts. She glanced up to him again and asked sweetly, ‘do you think one day I’ll be able to travel with you again, Lord Sesshomaru?’

The glimmer of hope that had been fluttering around in his mind flared up. _So she does want to stay with me?_ Just the thought of having her peaceful, calming, joyful presence with him once again, having her nearby, having her brighten his days, pushed a happiness through him. ‘It is your decision Rin. You can come with me today, if you wish.’ No doubt the old woman would not approve, but if that was what Rin truly wanted then she would not stand in her way. He would move mountains to make it happen.

‘Really?’ There was an eminent joy in her tone, but also an under note of hesitation. Something was holding her back from simply saying yes. But what?

He quashed the hope that had started to consume his mind. ‘If you would would rather stay here, I understand.’

She laughed, her delighted lilting giggle bubbling from the girl. ‘I _always_ want to be with you, Lord Sesshomaru! Don’t you know that?’ She skipped a step and added, ‘if you think I’m ready.’

 _Ready_.

That was her hesitation. The priestess had mentioned before that Rin was not _ready_ yet. Ready for what was another question, but apparently, she had to be ready for something.

Rin skipped again before bouncing into a twirl, spinning on the ball of her foot a few paces ahead of him. Her happiness at the prospect of returning to his company was overflowing, spilling out of her spinning and twirling dance steps down the path. But now Sesshomaru was hesitating.

_Ready for what?_

Time slowed for a moment, Sesshomaru noticing the raised tree root seconds before Rin stumbled across it. Her ecstatic spinning jolted to a stop as she went tumbling to the ground, dropping her possessions and throwing her hands out, a little squeal as she fell.

He was in front of her before her hands hit the dirt, catching her under her arms to stop her fall. Her face nearly smacked into his bent knee, and her body was twisted, her toes still snagged under the tree root. But she was alright, unharmed, safe. If nothing else, his duty was to always keep her safe.

She looked up to him, the shock of her trip and unexpected rescue still plain on her face. ‘Oops,’ she murmured. She righted herself and quickly gathered up the items she dropped, checking on the kanzashi pin to make sure it wasn’t damaged.

This was routine. Humans were not the most agile of creatures, and she was prone to trips and falls, injuries and maladies. Even though he had insisted she care for herself, having her in his stead had always taken up a good portion of his time, ensuring her safety. No doubt she would consume just as much time in his company again.

Her despondent gaze fixed on her items. Her joy and glee was gone, reality now settling in that she would be just as much a burden on him as she was the first time. This was what Lady Kaede had been telling her all along; that as much as she insisted she could care for herself, she still depended on him, his patience, his protection. She was not yet _ready_. She glanced up to him, keeping her head turned down, and murmured meekly, ‘Maybe I’ll wait a little longer.’

He leant forward, catching her gaze with his intent eyes, encouraging her to raise her head. He offered her comfortingly, ‘you have as long as you’d like to make your decision, Rin.’

Her lips curled up at the corners into a small smile. ‘If you promise you’ll come back to visit me, I’ll wait here for you.’

The tight nerve in his chest eased, and he found himself giving her a small gentle smile. It was not quite what he had been hoping for, but it would do for now. Rin pushed the items off her lap and jumped up to throw her arms around his shoulders, burying her face in the crook of his neck by his mokomoko. No one was nearby to see, so he allowed himself to indulge in her embrace, placing his hands on her back. For now, things would remain as they were, but perhaps one day when she felt _ready,_ she would join him again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The bouquet:  
> I tried to pick flowers that would be native to Japan, but I don’t think all of them are. They just had to have the right symbolism. The translations come from google so if any are wrong please let me know!  
> The ‘red flowers’ - Gladiolus  
> Kiku - chrysanthemum  
> Kingyoso - snapdragon  
> Take - bamboo (bamboo leaves)  
> Gekkeiju - bay laurel  
> Suikazura - honeysuckle


	10. Illness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rin is not well, and Sesshomaru isn’t going to leave her side, until she is well again. Even if it means relying on others to help heal her.

The unsettling instinct had been burying itself into his gut for three days now. It was a sickening sensation, one that made his stomach churn and his head sore, but he had no idea what was causing it. He only found that the sensation eased when he headed north, back towards her, towards Rin’s village. He woke Jaken just before dawn, informing him that they needed to return urgently to see Rin.

Something was wrong.

When they arrived at the village around noon he was relieved to find the village unscathed. At least it was not bandits nor demons that was making his stomach writhe.

Heads turned and whispers rippled around him as he strode through the village, towards his Rin. Her scent gave her away, she was still at home with the priestess. But again, there was something different about her scent. Had something else changed since his last visit? It was less than the full turn of the moon, did humans really change that fast?

Quiet whispers rippled through the priestess’ hut, the voices of the old woman herself, as well as the little fox demon from Inuyasha’s travelling party. Rin was inside, but he couldn’t hear her voice.

‘Old Priestess, are you home?!’ Jaken called out as he pulled the bamboo screen aside. ‘Lord Sesshomaru is here to check on Rin!’

‘Oh.’

The old woman and the fox demon froze, looking up as Lord Sesshomaru entered the small hut. Both were kneeling on one side of the fire while Rin lay on the other side, wrapped up in her futon, blanket pulled up to her chin, deathly still and pale as ice.

_Rin!_

‘Lord Sesshomaru,’ the priestess commented. ‘I am not surprised to see ye.’

* * *

Rin had been ill and worsening for the last three days. It had started with a cough, a little tickle in her throat that by the end of the day had become a dry barking sound. She had taken tea with ginger, insisting she was fine, but the next day the fever started, her temperature rising. The little food she had managed to eat she spewed back up. She slept mostly, but her condition was not getting any better.

They had tried remedies, herbs and potions, along with as much tea and clean water as the poor girl could stomach. Nothing had helped.

They had called in Jinenji, for his expert advice on how to heal her. He tried different cures, rare herbs and concoctions. Nothing had worked.

Jinenji knew of an herb that could cure such a powerful ailment. It was rare, brought to the land from far across the seas, but was rumoured to grow on the coast of the cold far north. He and Inuyasha were travelling there together at speed, in search of the herb.

Fortunately for Rin, Sesshomaru knew of the herb they searched for. His mother enjoyed it in her evening tea, and always had a place for it in her gardens. Hopefully she still had some. Jaken knew of the whereabouts of the Lady’s Palace in the Sky, so he instructed the little imp to take Ah-Un, collect the half demons, and go pay his respects.

Sesshomaru stayed with Rin. Though there was nothing he could do for her, he couldn’t stomach to leave her side. She lay still and quiet, sweat beading on her forehead, an occasional tremble running through her. Even though he knew it could not save her, he hoped that Tenseiga would provide some protection from any spectres of death, so he laid it alongside her futon, then sat by her side, leaning against the wall, and watched.

‘Would ye care for some tea, Lord Sesshomaru?’

‘No.’

The old woman fussed and pottered about, while the fox demon bounced around and fetched the things the woman needed. Sesshomaru held back his tongue, willing the pair of them to be silent and let Rin rest in peace. He needed her to get well again.

* * *

‘Inuyasha!!’

Jaken rode Ah-Un through the sky, following the main road that led north. Inuyasha wouldn’t be hard to spot in his bright red kimono, and the half demon he travelled with, Jinenji, was apparently large enough to be mistaken for a hairless bear demon, so hopefully he could find the pair easily.

‘Inuyasha! Where are you?!’

They had only left that morning, but had evidently travelled a fair distance already. The sooner he could find them, the better, as they would have to travel back to the south west to find Lord Sesshomaru’s mother’s palace.

He spotted a red thing moving along the road up ahead. ‘Ah! That _must_ be Inuyasha!’ He pulled on Ah-Un’s reins, but the dragon reared and fought against him. ‘Go down, you silly dragon!’ After a little struggle, he managed to convince the dragon to fly a little lower, towards the red thing moving away from them.

It was indeed Inuyasha, and the large, very large, half demon Jinenji, bounding with his large legs alongside the speedy Inuyasha. The pair eventually stopped when Inuyasha heard the call of his name, and waited as Jaken guided Ah-Un down to a heavy landing before them.

‘Thank goodness I’ve finally found you!’ Jaken squawked as he leapt off Ah-Un’s saddle. ‘You need to come with me at once.’

‘What? Why?’ Inuyasha snapped.

‘Are you not looking for turushi? The herb that can cure Rin?’

Inuyasha winced. ‘Yeah,’ he muttered. ‘I suppose Sesshomaru knows she’s sick?’

‘Indeed he does!’ Jaken snapped. ‘There is nothing that you can get past Lord Sesshomaru. Especially where it concerns Rin!’

‘Well it’s not like we were hiding it from him!’ Inuyasha snapped back. ‘He just wasn’t around!’

Jaken ignored the barking dog, and turned to the large monster of a half demon lingering behind Inuyasha. Somehow, he needed to get this beast-man up to the Palace in the Sky. ‘You are Jinenji, are you not?’

The beast nodded with a low groan.

‘You must come with me,’ Jaken instructed.

He turned back to Ah-Un. The dragon was not small, but he was not built for carrying a ten-foot monster on his back. Un stared up at the face of the giant half demon, while Ah glared down at Jaken, silently protesting.

‘Do you know where we can find some turushi?’ Jinenji asked, his voice low, soft and mellow.

‘Indeed,’ Jaken said. ‘I don’t suppose you can fly?’

Jinenji’s wide eyes blinked twice, then he slowly shook his head. ‘I’m sorry,’ he murmured.

Jaken sighed. ‘Well Inuyasha, it looks like you might have to stay behind.’ As he said it, he realised it was probably somewhat fortunate that Inuyasha could not join him to visit Lord Sesshomaru’s mother.

‘What are you talking about? I can run as fast as that thing can fly!’ Inuyasha barked.

‘That may be true,’ Jaken quipped back as he hopped up onto Ah-Un’s saddle, ‘but can you run to the Palace in the Sky?’

‘The what??’

‘Climb aboard Jinenji!’ Jaken instructed, despite the dragons’ grunts and groans of protest.

The lumbering demon trudged to Ah-Un’s side, but the dragon bucked, grunted, and moved away, evading the giant.

‘What are you doing silly beast? Be still, or you will feel the wrath of the Staff of Two Heads!’

Jaken pulled at the reins, but Ah-Un struggled still.

‘Ah-Un, be still! We must take the herb farmer to the Palace in the Sky! Be still!’

But the more Jaken struggled with the dragons’ reins, the more Ah-Un struggled back. Eventually Jaken was flung from Ah-Un’s back, flying high in the air before crashing to the ground on his head and flopping down on his back.

Inuyasha’s snickering face appeared over Jaken.

‘Where was it you were going?’ the half demon taunted.

* * *

She hadn’t woken since he arrived.

The old woman and the fox demon left Rin in Sesshomaru’s care while they headed out to fetch some ingredients for supper. Finally, some peace at last.

Another shiver coursed through her. Her whole body shook, trembling for a good few seconds, before she found peace again. Sweat had formed on her forehead once more, so he took the small cloth by her side and gently dabbed it away.

The whole room smelled of her sickly sweat. It was full of toxins and poisons, a disgusting sourness on the back of his tongue that threatened to bring up bile whenever he caught a strong whiff. It did not suit her usual scent well at all. It was just awful.

And there was nothing he could do. Perhaps he should’ve gone with Jaken. Or just gone straight to the palace himself. No, the herb farmer was the one who could identify the plant. But he would surely be faster to fetch the half demons and then go to the palace. Should he just go now? Or perhaps wait for the old woman and the fox demon to return. Or perhaps just trust Jaken to know the urgency of the matter.

‘No!’

Rin’s body twitched, one hand flying up from under the covers. Her sweet face twisted in agony and fear. Her legs kicked and the kakebuton flung off her body, revealing her small form in the sweat drenched cotton juban. The overwhelming sour stench of sweat and toxins swept over him, forcing him to swallow down the bile threatening to come up from his stomach. Rin mumbled in her sleep, her legs continuing to kick and twitch as a nightmare played through her.

‘No!’ she cried again, a desperation in her voice.

She wasn’t waking on her own so he reached out and took her hand, sliding his thumb into her small palm. ‘Rin.’

Her eyes flew open wide. Her breath hitched in her chest, short pants coming from her lips. She stared up to the ceiling for a good few moments, before her breathing started to slow and she noticed her surroundings.

She turned her head to the side, a wave of relief washing over her as her eyes landed on Sesshomaru. ‘You’re here,’ she whispered, her lips forming a little smile. Her voice was cracked, tired and raspy from days of coughing, and there was a darkness settling under her eyes. She was not well, not herself, but the smile she gave was entirely Rin.

Her fingers tightened around his thumb. A gentle sigh slipped out of her cracked and pale lips and her heavy eyes drifted shut again. For the first time since he’d arrived, she seemed to find a peacefulness. Somewhere underneath this illness, his Rin was still fighting.

* * *

After some negotiating with Ah-Un, the group moved along the ground, back towards the south west, until Inuyasha could scent out the great Palace in the Sky. Once they had located the palace, Ah-Un begrudgingly took Jaken and both half demons straight up, a short period of extreme exertion for the poor beast, until he collapsed on the palace steps. Jaken announced the trio to the guards, proudly proclaiming their presence on behalf of the great Lord Sesshomaru, his self-importance emanating from his puffed chest. Eventually they were permitted an audience with the Lady.

She sat upon her throne, awaiting the guests as they climbed the steps, Inuyasha loudly whinging about the stupidly long walk. Jaken snapped at him to shut up and let him do the talking as they approached the throne.

‘Well,’ the lady said, a ringing of amusement in her tone, ‘this is unexpected. Little demon, where is my son?’

‘Ahem!’ Jaken cleared his throat loudly as he stepped forward, stopping a few feet short of the throne. He bowed deeply, then announced, ‘my Lady, I come on behalf of Lord Sesshomaru to request your aid.’

‘Pardon?’ the dignified daiyoukai queried. ‘Sesshomaru wants my help, but he doesn’t even bother to come here himself.’

Jaken seized up. ‘Well, you see,’ he stammered. ‘The thing is…’ he fluffed, but couldn’t find the words. Even Sesshomaru’s mother was not satisfied with him as the lord’s emissary. Was he so unimportant? ‘Umm…’

‘Ugh,’ Inuyasha scoffed, ‘you’re so useless Jaken.’ He climbed up the last few steps, stopping beside the imp demon. ‘So you’re Sesshomaru’s mother, huh?’

She smiled at him, a smile that curled her lips graciously and narrowed her eyes slyly. ‘Indeed I am,’ she confirmed. ‘And you, who smells so much like my esteemed late husband, must be his half demon son. Inuyasha, if I’m not mistaken?’

‘Yep.’ An ear twitched, unfazed by her scrutinising gaze.

She turned her eyes to the third in her presence, travelling down and back up the large beast of a man before her. ‘And you?’ she asked. ‘I am not familiar with you, though it is obvious you are also half demon.’

‘This is Jinenji,’ Inuyasha answered for him with a flick of his head in Jinenji’s direction. The tall demon bowed deeply, cutting his size in half, his nose brushing the ground.

Her attention turned back to the smallest of the odd group. ‘Little demon, why do you bring two half demons to my doorstep?’ she asked inquisitively. Unlike her son, she at least did not sound offended by the presence of the half bloods.

‘Ah,’ Jaken said, jumping up and scurrying forward a step, to place himself in front of Inuyasha. ‘My Lady, please. Lord Sesshomaru believes you may possess a very rare herb. The turushi herb. We require it urgently to cure Rin from a deathly illness.’

‘Oh,’ she said, mild surprise widening her eyes a fraction. ‘The little girl is sick?’

‘Yeah she’s sick,’ Inuyasha snapped. ‘She’s damn well nearly dying, so can we skip the formalities? Do you have the herb or not?’

The lady turned her attention to the impatient barking dog, a laugh twinkling in her eyes before it spilled from her lips, twittering like a large flock of little birds, with a dainty clawed hand raising to cover her smile. The three guests stared at her, laughing in the face of the death of an innocent human girl.

Her hand lowered as her laugh faded, but her amused smile remained fixed in place. ‘It appears to me that forces beyond our will wish to ensure the girl dies,’ she stated. ‘Is this not the third time, to my knowledge, that she has been taken?’

‘Wha—?’ Jaken started, but cut himself off. ‘Well, she isn’t dead yet,’ he argued. He added, as an afterthought, ‘I hope.’

‘She’s not gonna die, alright?’ Inuyasha barked. ‘If you don’t have the herb, just say so and we’ll go find it somewhere else!’

‘Will you?’ the Lady questioned. ‘Turushi is very rare, not commonly found anywhere in our lands. If I do not have it, will you travel across the seas just to prolong the life of a little mortal girl?’

Inuyasha’s eyes narrowed at her and he growled, ‘we’ll do whatever it takes.’

‘But she is mortal,’ she rebutted with a nonchalant wave of her hand. ‘Surely, even as a half demon, you recognise that no matter what you do, eventually she will die.’

‘Yeah, but it ain’t happening today,’ Inuyasha snapped back at her just as quick. ‘Now do you have it or not?’ he added as his hand came to rest on the hilt of Tetsusaiga.

Before any of them could make another move, two dozen heavily armoured guards bearing long spears came rushing in, taking place around and in front of the lady on her throne, sharp weapons dropping down and aimed squarely at the trio of guests.

‘Agh!’ Jaken squeaked. ‘Enough of that Inuyasha!’ He leapt up to swat Inuyasha’s hand away from his sword. ‘Don’t even think about it!’ Inuyasha returned the nuisance imp’s swatting with a dull punch to Jaken’s nose.

While Jaken and Inuyasha fussed, Jinenji stepped forward. The guards turned their spears towards him, but he only took one step before bowing deeply again, dropping to one knee with his large hand spreading on the ground. ‘My Lady, please,’ he said, low, slow and soft. Inuyasha and Jaken even stopped their argument to listen. ‘Even though she is mortal, her life is no less precious than any other. She is still young, and she deserves the chance to live a full life. Please, my Lady, help us save her.’ He paused a moment, then added, hoping it might move her to action, ‘if for nothing else, please help us and spare Lord Sesshomaru the pain of her loss.’

The elegant lady sat still. She gazed past the soldiers with their dangerous spears, to the brave beast on his knee before her. The little demon and half breed dog presented no persuading arguments, but the lumbering brute stirred something. Eventually, she smiled and stood.

‘Come with me.’

* * *

The sky was dark, and there was still no sign of Jaken’s return. Rin was asleep again, while the old woman and the fox demon sat quietly, preparing a meal in anticipation of Inuyasha and Jinenji’s return. But there was no guarantee of their return tonight. His heartless mother may very well not give them the herb, or perhaps imprison or even slaughter them for simply asking.

If they weren’t back soon, he would go and get the herb himself.

‘Sesshomaru?’ the fox demon asked quietly. ‘Do you think they’ll be back tonight?’

He wanted to say yes, but to be perfectly candid, he didn’t know. He couldn’t give an answer.

As if by fate, a breeze ran through the open window, carrying Inuyasha’s distinct scent. Underneath the foul odour of his half demon brother was that familiar saltwater scent of the imp, and another new half demon carrying a strong smell of herbs.

‘Yes,’ he answered the fox demon.

The fox was surprised for a moment, his eyes widening before he scurried outside. ‘Inuyasha!’

The troupe returned within minutes, coming back to fill the small hut. Inuyasha entered first, bearing the fox demon on his shoulder, followed by Jaken, carrying an armful of the turushi herb. Lastly came the strange half demon, a towering creature more than twice the size of a normal man squeezing through the small doorway.

‘Ahh, Jinenji,’ the old woman noted, ‘you managed to procure the turushi?’

‘Yes,’ he answered, his voice low and mellow. ‘The lady was very accommodating.’

_Accommodating? Mother??_

The herb farmer set about making a medicine from the leaves and flowers of the herb, grinding it into a paste and then watering it down to a potion. Slowly and gently he woke Rin, had her sit up to take the potion. It smelt vile, and apparently tasted worse, but she took the medicine, and washed it down with water before laying back down.

The old woman finished the meal and dished out bowls for everyone. Jaken refused a bowl for Sesshomaru, and the sleepy Rin insisted she didn’t want to eat. While the others sat and ate, Rin tossed and turned, unable to get back to sleep.

She rolled onto her side, facing away from the fire, and opened her sleepy eyes to look up to Sesshomaru. She was so faint, but still tried her best to give him a weak little smile. One small hand stretched out of the futon towards him, reaching for his comfort, but stopped halfway as her eyes drifted shut, unable to summon the strength to move any further.

He placed his hand on the tail of his mokomoko and swept it across the floor, towards her. The warm fur brushed the back of her hand and she smiled. She pulled the mokomoko closer to her, in under the kakebuton, cuddling it to her chest. She nuzzled her face against his fur with a deep relaxing exhale, and resigned herself to sleep.

* * *

Rin slept through the night. Her breathing was laboured, but the old priestess assured Sesshomaru that she was better than the night before. She sweated a great deal, but the scent of the toxins started to dissipate as the night carried on.

She woke the next day when the others in the hut fussed about making another meal. Sesshomaru sensed her stirring first, and instructed Jaken to fetch her some fresh cold water. The imp leapt to it at once, scurrying off to his task.

She managed to stay awake for a short while, long enough to force down some tea, and watch Shippo and Jaken bicker over who could serve a better cup of tea. Jinenji gave her another cup of medicine to suffer through, which she managed marvellously, along with a tea to help her get to sleep again. She sat with Sesshomaru, nestled underneath his right arm, mokomoko wrapped around her to keep her warm. She sipped on her second cup of tea and made it through half of it before her body relaxed against his. He took the cup from her sleepy hands to place it on his other side, letting her rest in the warmth of his fur.

Not even Inuyasha’s snicker as he returned from his day’s work bothered him.

* * *

The night was still and quiet. Everyone slept except for Sesshomaru. Rin laid in the futon again, but requested the tail end of his mokomoko to hold while she slept.

She seemed better today than yesterday. Her breathing was still thick and heavy, she still coughed every few minutes, and the scent of sickness clung to her skin, her hair and clothes, but the medicine was starting to take effect.

Hopefully she would be safe.

Once again, she had nearly been taken. Once again, he had nearly lost her, and was unable to protect her.

Perhaps leaving her in the village was not the best for her. Was it worthwhile to leave her here when she was in just as much danger here as with him? When she could die at any minute and he may never even know?

But by the same token, this was the first time her life had been threatened in more than two years of living in the human village. Perhaps here was the best place for her.

The unsettling discomfort in his stomach was not going away. She had come too close, and he had let it happen. His fist tightened as he tried to push the swelling rage down. He had failed her again. There had to be something he could do to keep her safe.

* * *

She coughed again, a sharp barking cough that steadily got worse until she was fighting for breath. Shippo rubbed her back until she stopped, then held her water up for her. ‘Thank you, Shippo,’ she murmured hoarsely.

‘Can I get you anything, Rin?’ Jaken asked, scurrying forward.

Rin smiled, but shook her head. ‘I’m okay, thank you Master Jaken.’

Jaken shrunk backwards despondently.

‘Actually,’ Rin said, ‘I think I could eat something, Master Jaken. Do you think you could see if there are any momo on the tree?’

Jaken’s face broke into a grin, his eyes twinkling. ‘Of course, right away!’ He leapt to his feet again and hurried off.

She was well enough to be pandering to Jaken’s need to feel important, so she was on the mend.

* * *

Another long night of watching over her, of ensuring she was breathing well, she was able to sleep, she was getting better.

Jinenji made her one last remedy from the turushi, which she managed to swallow down, followed by some fresh water and ginger tea. Once the taste was washed from her mouth, she gave a big sigh and a smile up to the beast man. ‘Thank you, Jinenji.’ She slowly pushed herself up to her feet and placed a hand on his shoulder, leaning forward to gently kiss his cheek and sending a surge of pink into his long face.

Something oddly similar to rage coursed through Sesshomaru. The same spiteful thoughts that had plagued him for three days came rushing back, but it wasn’t aimed entirely at the bashful, reticent herb farmer. It was also at himself. He had allowed someone else to save Rin.

What was this rage? Was this... jealousy?

* * *

Rin fell asleep again after midday. Her breathing had returned to normal and she hardly coughed at all. Everyone seemed at peace that she was well again.

Sesshomaru waited for her to wake before making the decision to leave. He wondered for a moment if it would be better to leave while she was asleep, like always, but he couldn’t leave without a goodbye. Not this time.

Rin insisted on at least walking him out, but Jaken wouldn’t let her out of the hut. So she stood in the doorway and giggled at Jaken, albeit still weakly. She crouched down and cupped his face in her hands, pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead. ‘Thank you Master Jaken,’ she whispered.

This time, there was no surge of rage through the pit of Sesshomaru’s stomach, as he had felt when she showed the herb farmer her affection. He could deduce that it was because this was only Jaken, but he still couldn’t explain why her appreciation of the half demon had caused him such emotions.

Rin climbed to her feet and turned her smiling gaze up to Sesshomaru. He treasured her happy face, although it was still exhausted and weary, it meant she was safe. He couldn’t ask for more than that.

Without warning, Rin placed her hands on his shoulders, pulling her short self up to her toes and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek before swiftly sliding back. ‘Thank you, Lord Sesshomaru,’ she murmured coyly. ‘You saved me, again.’

Every trace of the rage that had consumed him before dissipated in an instant. Everything was alright when she smiled. ‘Rin,’ he said. ‘If you ever need me, you can call on me.’

She grinned and nodded. ‘Thank you Lord Sesshomaru.’

He turned on his heel and headed off, taking two steps down the path before lifting off the ground. ‘Wait for me, Lord Sesshomaru!’ Jaken squawked before bounding up onto Ah-Un’s saddle and taking off to follow him.

She was safe again. Even though the village was the best place for her, for now, she was mortal, and that meant there would always be dangers for her. It was his role, and his alone, to protect her, no matter what the danger.

He glanced back, the first time he had ever looked back at her, and saw her still standing in the doorway, still watching him. Perhaps one day he wouldn’t be leaving her behind again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More than half way now! Thank you everyone who has commented so far, honestly your comments and kudos give me life. I hope Sessh doesn’t seem to out of characters for this chapter, I just enjoy exploring his somewhat limited emotional range, especially for the sake of his Rin.  
> Anyway, thank you my beautiful readers! You guys are awesome <3


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